Vegetarian Piranha: The Story of Nick Punto

Interleague Part II

2011-06-27T20:37:00.000-07:00

Earlier, I noted about American League managers and their fascination with double switches. This year, I watched mostly National League games for the first few months. Over the past week, I have watched several games with NL announcers calling a game in an American League park. They kept obsessing over that "9th hitter" in the lineup. There are a handful of tough yet positionless DH's in the AL. Generally, it seems to me that many teams just look at their eight best hitters and DH the worst fielder among them. If it were an NL team, he'd be in the field. In the AL, that extra half of a player is actually in the field. And he probably hits below .250 with little power. Heck, some of them probably hit closer to .200. At this point, there are only two differences between AL and NL baseball. The AL has a slightly better defense on the field. Whereas, in the NL the worthless hitter at the bottom of the lineup has productive at-bats, drives in key runs, and gets the bunt down. This is really just my perception, but I'd be interested to compare it to reality. But if I took the time to fact check everything, then I wouldn't ever post anything.

Personally, I love having a DH in exactly one league. The DH brings a different kind of purity to the game. You have a real pitcher, eight real fielders behind him, and 9 real batters in the lineup. As the game has specialized, it's just not possible to have 9 all-around players out there. That's, of course, the purity of the NL. The rules of the game force everybody to do everything. The players, coaches, and managers have to decide the perfect balance of skills.

U2

2011-06-26T22:00:00.000-07:00

On Friday night, I knew the Marlins were playing a late game, so I took my chance to watch the early Pirates game. The Pirates finished their win over Boston at about 9:15 and I flipped over to the Marlins game. They were showing the Marlins batting lineup and oddly it included the pitcher. Then I noticed the Marlins were wearing the home white pants and it was the bottom of the first. The field looked suspiciously like Safeco. Of course, the announcers explained the whole story in the top of the first which I had missed. Sure, I could just look it up, but I hoped that at some point they'd mention it. Apparently, there was a U2 concert in Miami. At first, it seemed silly that a concert would bump the ballgame. Then I realized that they're lucky to get 10,000 fans at a Marlins game. For a 3 game series, that might be 30,000. I'm fairly certain that u2 could fill more seats than that.

Also, watch out for catcher Carlton Tanabe of the Clinton Lumberkings. He may only be the backup catcher for the Mariners Single-A affiliate, but he's a real good catch-and-throw guy. He calls a good game. Handles the young staff very well. Forget having a pitching coach out there on the field. He's like having another manager on the field. Or maybe he's just a backup catcher in the minor leagues. I suppose it's guys like this who hang around until they're 30 and find a job somewhere in the majors.

Davenport Iowa

2011-06-19T16:14:00.001-07:00

Hey, at least I post more often than the Marlins win.

This weekend, I finally took my Eastern Iowa Minor League Baseball road trip. I've been stewing on the idea for a few years when I saw reports that one of the nicer parks in the minors is in Davenport, Iowa. There are also minor league teams in Cedar Rapids, Des Moines, Clinton, and Burlington. Just about any weekend should feature a decent amount of baseball. This year, the scheduling worked to go to Clinton on Thursday night and then to Davenport on Friday and Saturday.

Naturally, we had to stop at the Field of Dreams near Dyersville. There are few if any signs directing passing motorists on US-20. You have to know to exit in Dyersville. Then you drive past a Pamida and a Hardees. I'm not sure I knew that either of those existed. In our case, we had to navigate a detour of the main street, too. Otherwise, you just have to know where to go. It's only a mile or two out of town. It looks just like the movie, though the corn isn't too high yet. Having grown up playing baseball on fields with pine trees for an outfield, it seems rather ordinary. I think that's the point and I'm glad that I saw it.

Modern Woodmen Park- as it's called these days- in Davenport exceeded expectations. If you enjoy baseball, you need to attend a game in this stadium. The whole experience feels like you've stepped into one of those old black and white photos you see of baseball from the 30's. We even had to wait for a train to roll through before stopping at the box office. This is just a great place for baseball. Pictures and descriptions don't do it justice. As they said on Reading Rainbow, you don't have to take my word for it. Go and find out for yourself.

Interleague Play

2011-05-20T18:57:00.001-07:00

Among other things, I've been busy moving over the past month. Interleague play seems like an appropriate occasion to return to blogging.

I have mostly been watching Marlins games. Occasionally, by the time I retire to the sofa, the Western Division games are just beginning. Either way, I tend to favor watching NL games. During Interleague games, the AL announcers love to tell us about the National League brand of baseball. They do complicated double switches such as putting the pitcher in to bat third and bringing in a reserve outfielder to bat 9th. Wheels are turning in the dugouts. In reality, the majority of managers making moves like this are AL managers playing in NL ballparks. In a regular NL game, a real double-switch involves pinch-hitting a light-hitting middle infielder for the pitcher and replacing the #8 hitting second baseman with the new pitcher. That's it. Meanwhile, the pitchers usually hit well enough that I don't even notice that it's the pitcher hitting.

The Royals

2011-04-10T06:50:00.001-07:00

Yesterday afternoon, I watched the Royals play the Tigers. I have followed baseball for long enough to know better than to draw conclusions from a small sample. I have also seen that often, the team of the future turns out to be the team of the present. Both SI and ESPN the Magazine lauded the Royals farm system and proclaimed them to be the team to beat a few years from now. The experts discredited this group and instead focused on the big-spending White Sox, Twins, and Tigers.

This current Royals group has nothing to lose, and in yesterday's game they played like it. In the early innings, the Royals had runners on first and second with one out. The batter hits a medium line drive into left field. The third base coach waves Billy Butler around to score. The leftfielder struggles to get the ball from his glove. Finally, he throws it home. Even after the bobble, the ball arrives just in time, but it was high and wide. Butler scores to take a 1-0 lead. If Detroit executes here, there is no chance Butler scores. I suspect the coaches know this and don't care. Instead, they want to force division rivals to prove that they can make the play.

Later, the Royals are clinging to a 2-0 lead. The Tigers have a runner on first. The batter rips a double down the left-field line and into the corner. Alex Gordon chases it down and fires a strike to the cut-off man. Then he fires a one-hop throw that hits the catcher directly in his mitt exactly as the runner arrives. The catcher had positioned himself perfectly to block to plate. The runner actually puts himself out by touching the catchers mitt in an attempt to dislodge the ball. Although it could be argued that the catcher did not have control of the ball, I think the umpire agrees with my "a tie goes to the runner except when the defense just made a perfect play" interpretation. A runner should score from first on a double to the corner. There was absolutely no margin for error. Gordon has to hustle and make a strong and accurate throw to the cutoff man. The cutoff man has to quickly and accurately relay the ball to the plate. The catcher has to block the plate, handle the throw, and apply the tag. They did all of these things.

Baseball is a game of execution. Both of these plays could easily have gone the other way, but they didn't. None of these factors show up in the box score. Perhaps some new-fangled stats account for them, but otherwise, they don't really show up on the league leader boards. But they win ballgames. Maybe yesterday was just KC's day and a bad day for Detroit. If Kansas City continues to execute like this and the other teams rely on the payroll and star status, then the Royals will win the division.

First Week

2011-04-09T07:02:00.000-07:00

Last Sunday, I missed the top of the first of the Marlins game because I was still cleaning up the kitchen after lunch. I discovered the Marlins trailing 3-0 and facing R.A. Dickey. Soon, it was 5, 6, or maybe even 7-0- not that it mattered. The whole game was startlingly familiar and by the fifth or so, I had switched to watching the Cubs and Pirates. On Thursday evening, I watched the entire game. It was a fairly "normal" game. The Marlins starter lasted into the 6th, several relievers pitched, and I think eventually the Nationals won in extra innings. On Friday, I picked up the game in the bottom of the 8th. In the top of the inning, the Marlins had rallied to take a 3-2 lead. The Astros leadoff man reached, they bunted him to second, and he stole third. At this point, I realized that the starter was still pitching. The next batter fouled off several pitches until finally chasing a 3-2 slider for strike three. Carlos Lee popped up on a few pitches to end the inning. It was pretty exciting. In other words, the starter:
1. Pitched effectively into the 8th inning
2. Pitched himself out of trouble
3. Pitched himself out of trouble in the 8th inning
4. Pitched effectively after his team had rallied to give him a lead
5. Struck out a tough batter who kept fouling off pitches

The Marlins?!?!?!?

2011-04-01T19:04:00.000-07:00

After one game, I like these Marlins. I watched a game, and I didn't know quite what to expect. When they loaded the bases in the middle innings of a scoreless game for the veteran John Buck, I was actually a little nervous. He could strike out. He could GIDP. He could hit a sacrifice fly. He could hit an RBI single. In fact, he fought of several tough pitches before hitting an opposite field grand slam. I guess that stadium in Florida has a good batting eye or something. Some guy named Johnson took a no-hitter into the seventh. Apparently, he hit 3 HR's and drove in 19 runs last season.

On the flip side, the Mets are awful. I knew they were bad, but I didn't realize just how depressing it is. Perhaps comparing the Twins to the Mets was a bit of a stretch.

Now, I have the Angels/Royals game on. An Angels hitter just failed to lay down a sacrifice bunt because he tried to bunt for a base hit. Now, he's swinging away.

At any rate, I love baseball.

The Search

2011-02-19T08:23:00.001-08:00

I have yet to officially choose a team, but the season rapidly approaches. I realize that with college basketball playoffs looming, I may forget to choose a team. I want to force myself to choose the team before the season starts. As such, I will choose a provisional team. If I do not choose another team before a pitch is thrown in the regular season, this choice will become permanent. Realistically, I will be too lazy and or distracted the change my mind so this will probably be final.

I began my search considering all factors as legitimate reasons to choose a team. The talk of the Twins supposed surplus of starting pitching had me wanting to pick a team which actually good pitching. I researched a few candidates. The Braves still have several quality arms. The A's have assembled a solid staff. The Padres ranked pretty high in the ERA category and I remembered reading an ESPN the Magazine feature on their bullpen. As I investigated, I realized what I really want. I want a team about whom I know absolutely nothing. I don't want to spend the off-season reading blog posts analyzing the VORP or WHIP of the player the team just signed to a minor league deal. I want to learn about the team- for better or worse- by watching the games. The less prior knowledge I have about the team at the start of the season, the more I can enjoy it.

I'm not sure I could even name a single player on this team's roster. I don't know who their manager is. In skimming over baseball headlines this winter, I have not heard anything about them. I know just enough about them to know that I have no idea what to expect. Perhaps most importantly, they have shared very few players with the Twins. At this point, the Houston Astros are second on my list followed by the Colorado Rockies. That leaves the Florida "Who the hell are the" Marlins in first. Technically, Houston is probably a better fit in the total ignorance category, but I already have a Marlins hat and Back to the Future II is my latest Netflix disc. I can think of no better way to spend the baseball season than answering Harry Caray's question: "The Marlins!?!?!? Who the hell are the Marlins?!?!?!?"

Comment of the Day

2011-01-24T19:19:00.000-08:00

Today's Star Tribune comment of the day comes from martyu:

Start printing the Minnesota Twins 2011 World Champion T-Shirts...it's gonna be an awesome summer!!!

He's half right. When hasn't it been an awesome summer for the Twins? It's those pesky other seasons like fall that get them into trouble.

St. Louis

2011-01-21T15:53:00.000-08:00

Should I preemptively pick the Cardinals for when they trade Delmon Young for Nick Punto? Actually, that won't happen unless Gardy incapacitates Bill Smith and convinces the powers-that-be to name him interim general manager. But if that happens for even five minutes that trade happens.

Yankees

2011-01-20T17:03:00.000-08:00

Perhaps I need to reconsider the Yankees as a contender. A team with a billionaire owner and brand-new stadium essentially outbid them for a solid pitcher. Keep in mind that they buy their division series victories. Honestly, if they had let Jeter walk they'd be a strong contender. Actually, I'm not sure there's anything any team could do to trump giving him the finger and tell him not to let the door hit him.

On another note, I saw that Gil Meche retired. He's still under contract, so naturally the Royals are going to pocket his $12 million salary.

Football

2011-01-19T15:45:00.000-08:00

I have been intrigued by fans reactions to the Twins off-season moves. To me, it seems Billy Smith is doing a pretty good job to Gardy-proof the roster. Everybody is up-in-arms at the departures of Hardy, Guerrier, Rauch, and Crain. My addition by subtraction theory is well-documented. Theoretically, of course, Punto is gone. Harris was traded, but as I mentioned earlier, I forgot he was still in the system. Of those six, the Twins would be lucky if one of them managed to not do more harm than good. Meanwhile, everybody is infuriated that they signed Capps. I didn't see him pitch much, but with relievers I will always take the fresh face. Everybody wonders how they could let Hardy go. Punto is to blame for the irrational love of Hardy. Who else could make an injury-prone shortstop with a mediocre bat look irreplaceable? Who here has heard of Starlin Castro or Ronny Cedeno? I readily admit I had not until tonight. Castro hit about .300 with 3 HR and 41 in 125 games playing shortstop for the Cubs last year. Cedeno hit .256 with 8 HR and 41 RBI in about 140 games for the Pirates last year.

What does this have to do with football? Why am I analyzing the Twins off-season when I claim to be switching teams? I would wager that typical baseball fans- myself included- hardly ever watch a contest that does not include their team. Whereas, with football, there are two games Sunday afternoon, one in the evening, and a game on Monday night. I think it would be fair to assume that the typical football fan watches his team's game and at least on other on average. Over the course of the season, at least half and up to three fourths of his time watching football are a team other than his favorite. Certainly this tunnel-vision in baseball affects a fan's perception of a team. Baseball fan's are like prisoners in a cave watching the shadows on the wall. This is why I am "trying" a different team next year. I want the contrast.

AL Central

2010-12-30T16:23:00.000-08:00

The other teams in the division are all pretty much like the Twins. Except, the Sox won a World Series, the Tigers made one, and the Indians came within a game six choke of winning the AL pennant. I guess that leaves the Twins tied with the Royals for postseason wins in the last 6 seasons. The entire division is too close to what I've followed for the last decade, so I can't give any of them serious consideration. Instead, I will examine a few alternative choices:

Chiba Lotte Marines
I have explained my "addition by subtraction" philosophy of offseason moves before. I don't know much about the Marines, but I do know that they lost a middle infielder from last season. That's usually a step in the right direction. Plus, they have $5 million to burn.

Round Rock Express
Sure they have a lame nickname, but they have been the home of one of the stars of my fantasy baseball team. I could finally follow the career of "hot" prospect Chris Davis. Austin is supposed to be a pretty nice city. It's hip and trendy, but since it's in Texas, I can't imagine it's quite like Seattle, Portland, or San Francisco. Then again, maybe it is. Meanwhile, the Rangers seem to be in pretty good shape, so I would expect they have decent players working their way through the capital of Texas.

Mankato Moondogs
For each home game, they designate a player on the other team. Each time he strikes out, beer is half-price for the remainder of inning. Once, he was 0-2 with 2K's facing an 0-2 count when the Moondogs pitcher plunked him. Also, occasionally, the opposing manager will hurl the game ball into center field in a temper tantrum after the bottom of the first.

New Ulm Kaiserhoff
Is Terry Steinbach still pitching for them? I saw them play a few summers ago, and I still suspect that they were actually the 1989 Oakland Athletics. They even had the green and yellow uniforms.

Murray's Corner Store*
They may be third-graders, but the really know how to run around those bases. Well, actually, most of them don't know that you have to tag-up on a fly ball. Of course, they all sprint towards home plate at the first chance they get. I know a lot of Major Leaguers don't know that you have to cross the plate before the third out, though. They have also proven that they can beat Anderson Pharmacy* and Gunderson Implement and Tractor* in the playoffs.

So there you have it. I guess I'll have to get started on my next iteration of inspecting the teams. I've never been one for that, so I'll probably channel my inner Lou Brown and go with a hunch.

* All business names are intended to be fake.

AL West

2010-12-28T18:40:00.000-08:00

The AL West brings back painful memories of Twins road trips during the 1990's. The time zone could work against these teams. More recently, I think of Dick Bremer perpetually reminding Twins fans how many times they play Seattle this month. With only four teams, it's easy to forget they're even playing.

Seattle Mariners
I'm still recovering from their dismissal of manager Don Wakamatsu. As I've said, anybody who gets into a fight with a weak-hitting and overpaid middle infielder is fine by me. At least they replaced him with manager Eric Wedge. He has also done something Gardy hasn't. I am certainly curious about the Mariners, but there isn't enough for me to root for them.

Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, California
Lately, the Angels have combined everything that's wrong with the family-friendly Twins with all of my complaints about the Yankees. I suppose that's basically the Mets, but it's not comical. I don't know quite what to think of Angels skipper Mike Scioscia. He seems similar to Gardy, but I feel considerably different when he summons a reliever with a 2-run lead in the 8th than when Gardy does the same. I'd say that's because Tolbert, Punto, and Casilla are due up for the Twins, but somehow Scioscia's scrubs are actually somewhat threatening. Following the Angels, then, would mainly be an academic exercise. How similar or different are they from the Twins?

Oakland Athletics
A's general manager Billy Beane has been lauded- mainly by himself- for his Moneyball strategy to win games. As I understand, he picks an offensive statistic from a hat, acquires or develops players who are best at this, and has Tim Hudson, Mark Mulder, and Barry Zito in the cheap years of their contracts. The current roster has a handful of quality cheap- I mean young- pitchers and a futile- I mean high on-base-percentage- lineup. Do they still play in the Al Davis Coliseum? I think I may have to resort to the time zone argument if I want to rule them out.

Texas Rangers
Manager Ron Washington still wears his uniform without the wuss-out windbreaker. That alone might be enough for me. Nolan Ryan insists on building the team around quality pitching. It seems to be working. They've left themselves a target for this year. First, they need to remind us that although Cliff Lee was a huge part of reaching the World Series, he didn't do it alone. Second, they need to actually win the World Series. I have heard positive reports about the ladies in the Dallas metroplex and my favorite television show, King of the Hill, is set somewhere near Dallas. They play their games in the best mix of time zones of any team which would allow me the chance to watch an entire game and make my bedtime or retire to the sofa at 9:00pm to watch baseball to end my day.

The players in their lineup don't excite me too much, though. I also might feel a little bit too much like a fair-weather fan for jumping to a team that already won the AL pennant. At any rate, I think they are the front-runner after my first iteration through the teams.

NL East

2010-12-27T17:20:00.000-08:00

With any luck, the NL East might provide me with a team that starts and finishes it's games early.

NY Mets
They're the Mets. What else needs to be said? They do deserve at least one argument on their behalf. I could spend the entire season quoting Apu from the Simpsons when he says that the "Ny Mets are my favorite squadron."

Washington Nationals
I already wasn't wild about them and then they signed that one guy to a huge deal. They should be mired in mediocrity for a while.

Philadelphia Phillies
They landed Cliff Lee and have one of the top teams in baseball. Of the big-spenders, they are probably in best position to legitimately contend for a World Series. They should be a pretty good team, but I can't imagine they would be much fun to root for. I haven't heard many flattering descriptions of the city of Philadelphia, either.

Atlanta Braves
They are the National League Twins. That World Series win was a long time ago. Otherwise, they have a history of early playoff exits. Heck, this year was a surprise that they even made it that far. For as much as a like a crusty old character like retired manager Bobby Cox, he was probably a bit of a Gardy. Now he's gone, so perhaps the Braves are free to explore what happens without him. They brought in some lousy left-handed reliever that the Dodgers didn't want. I have heard mostly good about the city of Atlanta. ESPN's Page 2 columnist Bill Simmons raves about the ladies in Hot'lanta and his readers and my brother confirm this. I have also heard good things about Chick-fil-A. Atlanta will definitely be among the contenders, but I do not know that I can excited myself about the baseball team enough to actually pick them.

Florida Marlins
I already have a battle-worn hat. My roommate introduced me to this audio clip of a confused Harry Caray. Every time I hear somebody mention the Marlins, I blurt this out like a reflex. I could really enjoy a full season of this:

Announcer: Two outs and a runner on for the Marlins ...
Me (to myself): The Marlins?!?!? Who the hell are the Marlins?!?!?

I've always admired their "Fire Sale" strategy, but they don't seem to have employed it in some time. I do like that shortstop who fired the manager last year. They could assemble a solid squad this season. Then again, they play in the only state to have it's own tag on Fark.com. I'm not sure I'd like the humidity of south Florida either. I'm sure Miami has it's girls, but it's probably too much a party town for an early-to-bed sort like me. Altogether, the Marlins are a strong contender. The Marlins? Who the hell are the Marlins?

NL Central

2010-12-26T14:49:00.000-08:00

I expect the NL Central to be much like its AL equivalent, except with more potent offense because the pitchers bat.

Cincinnati Reds
They surprised people by winning the division and making the playoffs last season. They've also left themselves room for improvement in 2011. They will certainly receive consideration.

Houston Astros
I keep forgetting that they exist. This may be a good thing or a bad thing. Either way, I'm at least curious enough to see who they have, what they are, and what they could do that I'll take a closer look. On the other hand, Houston is known for its humidity in the summer.

St. Louis Cardinals
I should like the Cardinals and Manager Tony LaRussa more than I do. ESPN always seems obsessed with a them. That kind of annoys me. There are probably plenty of convincing arguments that could be made for them, but I just don't think I could get excited about them.

Milwaukee Brewers
Milwaukee is a decent city to visit. I don't much care for Miller Park. The team has a solid lineup if they could get some pitching. They did trade for Greinke, but in the process they acquired that shortstop who always finds his way onto my fantasy team. It's an AL only league, so I suppose I could credit them with sparing me this year. I still feel "betrayed" that they left the American League. Moreover, I can never forgive them for getting rid of the old "Mb" glove logo which was the most perfect baseball logo ever. It was the perfect blend of cute, clever, and descriptive. I will not actively follow the Brewers as a contender, but if something catches my attention- such as bringing back the old logo- they may move up the rankings.

Pittsburgh Pirates
They have a fantastic stadium. The tickets are cheap. Pittsburgh is supposed to be a deceptively nice city. If they win 60 games and finish in 5th it would be an excitingly successful season. Supposedly, they are trying to groom a nucleus in the minors and hold them together to rebuild the franchise. They are more of an "investment" so nobody could accuse me of being a fair-weather fan. In fact, my interest in the Pirates is at least partially a statement about the current Twins configuration. At least these minor-leaguers for the Pirates might win a game in October. The Pirates are definitely a strong contender. Even if I do not choose them, I may catch a game or two.

Chicago Cubs
There's always next year.

NL West

2010-12-21T16:46:00.000-08:00

Due to my reader's impatience, I will skip the NL East and head west tonight. The timezone will be a major factor with these teams.

Arizona Diamondbacks
I don't like them. They sound like one of those made-up team from a baseball movie that didn't have the MLB license.

Colorado Rockies
With all the talk about asterisks and steroids, there is only true single-season home-run champion: Ellis Burks with my Rockies on Triple Play Gold Edition for the Sega Genesis. They have a nice stadium, Denver is a nice place to visit, and- based on a Pirates blogger's opinion- are rid of manager Clint Hurdle. They have pretty much disappeared ever since their Goldbergian winning streak that took them to the World Series a few years ago. They play their home games in the Mountain time zone and will travel to the Pacific time zone to play San Diego, Los Angeles, and San Francisco. I'm not sure I'm ready to stay up that late, but they're at least worth consideration.

Los Angeles Dodgers
Their owners' divorce is destroying the franchise, they just signed Matty, I've never cared for them, and over half of their games are in the Pacific time zone.. On the other hand, they signed Juan Castro. During his tenure with the Twins, Juany showed that he knows how to handle a bat. Also, there should be an abundance young ladies in Southern California rooting for the Dodgers.

San Diego Padres
They say southern California girls are unforgettable, but I bet I would forget after Jason Bartlett boots three grounders in one inning. On the other hand, he would be a fun player to root against. I'd want the Padres to win despite Bartlett's struggles. They're roughly on par with the Rockies. I'll watch them more closely than other teams in the West, but doubt I could actually settle on them.

San Francisco Giants
They play in San Francisco.

Fine. You want a baseball reason, too. I just don't think this will be an interesting year for them. They weren't exactly a one-hit wonder. It's not necessarily a disappointment if they don't win a World Series, but that's obviously less than in 2010. They should still be competitive. It's just not the combination that would be exciting for a fan.

Altogether, the time zone probably rules out the entire division. I'm just too much of an early-to-bed kind of guy. On the other hand, I could see myself settling in to relax before bed by watching the start of the game. A good game would be done by 11:30 and a bad game would be obviously bad by 10:30. Bartlett was once denied a starting spot in favor of Juan Castro. Now they're in the same division. How exciting!

AL East

2010-12-20T17:52:00.000-08:00

In my quest for a new team, all criteria other than sabremetric over-analysis will be fair game. The team's time zone, reported availability of quality single women, potential as a vacation destination, number of former Twins on the roster, and funniness of cynical bloggers may all be considered. Who knows what else I might think of? Let's start by assessing the American League East for it's potential.

Baltimore Orioles
The Orioles intrigue me. In a league of Kansas Cities and Pittsburghs, they have quietly been one of the losingest franchises since the Brady Anderson era. Yet, 2011 might be a year they can enter with some optimism. Watching the Orioles finish in 3rd place with 83 wins sound more exciting than a division series sweep.
Boston Red Sox
I don't keep too close of tabs on the Red Sox. That's mostly because everybody hopped their bandwagon thinking the Sox are the anti-Yankees. In reality, they are the Yankees. At any rate, they have a young star or two flanked by above-average veterans. They're pitching staff isn't in very good shape. If they were my only choice, I think I'd be coming back to Minnesota in hurry. Young, Mauer, and Morneau are a better nucleus than anything in Boston.
New York Yankees
No, they are not automatically excluded just by virtue of being the Yankees. But they just signed a 36-year-old shortstop who is only a marginal improvement over your Yuniesky Betancourts to a how many year deal with worth how many million? They're also similar to the Red Sox, though the veterans are somewhat better. I'm not sure what they have for young talent. Regardless, the best they can hope for is another AL Central title for the Twins. On the other hand, there is some pretty good food in the Big Apple and it's been a few years since I've been there.
Tampa Bay Rays
They just traded Bartlett. A few days ago, in a news article, I noticed that the greatest athlete of all-time was wearing a Rays jersey. If Hulk Hogan lives in Clearwater and thinks the Rays are the team, it's tough to argue. Starting pitcher Matt Garza puts a flying elbow drop on that case, though. Then again, Brad Radke also lives in Clearwater, so there's always a chance that all-time favorite baseball player could wander out to the mound and pitch 8 innings, allow three hits and one run, and claim he didn't have his best stuff. Rays Manager Joe Maddon tends to favor common sense over managing by the book.
Toronto Blue Jays
The Blue Jays are the number one contender among American League teams. First, I already have the hat. Second, you can pretty much refer to my earlier post about how they are basically the same as the Twins. If they can hold the offense anywhere near last season's level and stabilize the pitching rotation, they could leap into relevance.

Overall, I'm hesitant to pick a team in the AL East. With the patient hitters, the games last so long that they'll end after my bed time. Also, I am curious about National League baseball. Is it really as different as all the hype? Is managing with a pitcher in the lineup really as difficult as AL Managers (of the Year) make it look in inter-league games?

The Truth

2010-12-14T18:40:00.000-08:00

What do I have in common with Nick Punto this offseason? We're both looking for a new team. One of us will inevitably end up back with the Twins, and it's not going to be me. After much prayer, soul-searching, and consultation with my brother, I have come to realize that I am not a Twins fans. Relationships take work, but I'm doing more than my fair share. Unlike an interpersonal relationship, with a sports team, the fan should just have to show up. The Twins may go on to great success without me, but I have concluded that I wouldn't really enjoy being along for the ride.

Despite all the hate for Punto I know his (potential) departure will not fix the franchise. Deep down, Twins fans do not hate Punto because he is the cause of the team's mediocrity. The anger is because he symbolizes everything that is wrong with this franchise. The Twins try too hard to create the "Little Engine that Could" image. Gardy is still here, and he's more than eager to have some speed in his middle infield. He's just another symptom, though. When you combine fancy new stadium, "We're just happy their competitive" fans, a weak division, a hometown hero, and a business savvy ownership, you're going to get what the Twins have been.

What will I do without the Twins? Especially during the World Series, I realized that it's baseball I love. I have always wondered what it's like to root for another team. Most baseball fans have tunnel vision on their team. When you only watch one team, you notice every flailing strike three, every booted grounder, and every boneheaded bullpen decision. Are other teams managers just as dumb? Are their middle infielders just as pathetic? I'm looking forward to finding out. At least all the players start with a clean slate.

In the coming weeks, I will try to chronicle my search for the new team. I think already have it narrowed down to a short list, but I'll try to build some drama while I research contenders.

Juan Uribe

2010-10-29T20:28:00.001-07:00

After watching the other playoff matchups, I'm convinced anybody who defends Nick Punto has never watched any other team. Uribe actually plays good defense. He's a better hitter, too. Yet, the Giants only paid him $3 million a year.

The Yankees

2010-10-06T17:28:00.000-07:00

The Twins are playing the Yankees in the playoffs. There is plenty of talk about the Twins recent history against the Yankees in the postseason. Some are glad to play the Yankees because they want to get the proverbial monkey off the back. Some think the Twins will lose because they always lose. I hope nobody wanted the matchup with Tampa instead. On one hand, that's like bunting to setup Kubel. On the other, the Rays are just as dangerous. In the playoffs- much like the regular season- the team the matters most is not the opponent. Either way, the Twins are playing their side of the game. The team that wins the World Series is the team that does that for three consecutive series.

The Twins struggles against the Yankees in the playoffs are largely coincidental, anyway. Remember that series with Oakland? The Twins could have lost that series to anybody- including Toronto, Kansas City, or Detroit.

Highlights

2010-10-04T18:59:00.000-07:00

My brother shared this YouTube video with me:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=95RzmDD2MGU

He think they should make one for the Twins. I'd be content with a montage of Punto throwing the ball into the outfield in a desperate attempt to turn two with two outs and nobody on base. To be complete, we'd need Mauer GIDP'ing, Span getting picked off, Ullger sending the runner, SlowBakeBurn melting down, Perkins in a Red Wings jersey, Morneau endorsing fast food eateries and water softeners, Andy trotting out to the mound, and Joe Vavra smugly watching Young and Thome hit bombs as though he taught them how to do it.

Final Series

2010-09-30T19:55:00.001-07:00

This series with the Blue Jays is a playoff series. I've already posted my thoughts on how the Twins compare with Toronto. Technically, the games may be meaningless, but Toronto is unquestionably a playoff caliber team.

My middle school baseball team once lost a game 6-2. After the game, the other team's coaches told us that it was the first game they had not won by the 10-run mercy rule. They said that it was because they didn't pitch their best pitchers. Meanwhile, the Twins have allowed 59 runs- make that 60- in the last week. That's about the same number of runs the Twins allowed from the start of September until the Tigers series. It's okay, though. Jim Thome, Joe Mauer, JJ Hardy, and others were resting because the division had already been clinched. Well, Punto's lousy defense at short did surrender a few runs, so I suppose it's at least something of an excuse.

Losing streaks happen to every baseball team. That doesn't concern me. I am, however, disconcerted at just how easily they're losing. A team that's headed to the playoffs should at least be playing quality baseball. They're just embarrassing themselves.

Manager of the Year

2010-09-18T08:50:00.000-07:00

People seem to be nominating Ron Gardenhire for manager of the year. After all, his team has all but wrapped up its division and has one of the best records in the league. He's also taken a team with one of the best rosters in the league that plays in one of the weakest divisions to this point. Let's not forget the Twins entered the year among the favorites to contend for the World Series title. To this point, he has met expectations. There are plenty of managers out there who could screw this up, but I'd like to think there are at least a few doing more with less. Ozzie Guillen took the White Sox into September still in contention for a playoff spot.

Gardy can't even take credit for some of his best moves. He reluctantly played Delmon Young everybody because Bill Smith didn't give him any outfielders. Even then, he tried to bench Young because Kubel couldn't hit. He had nothing to do with Pavano. And he still hasn't found a way to play Punto from the DL.

Pavano and Buehrle

2010-09-16T19:14:00.001-07:00

Baseball needs more pitchers like Pavano and Buehrle. They know the drill.

I am usually the type to say, "The Twins won, but..." But when they keep winning, it means they must be doing something right. But, Nick Punto is hurt. So by that logic, Punto's absence must be a good thing. I'm still convinced that no Punto at all is better than an injured Punto, but I'll take it.

Beyond that, I don't know how to feel about the Twins. I claim I want the World Series title. Years of hovering just above mediocre have turned me cynical. I don't have that unwavering and often irrational "This is the year" mentality. (My friends can vouch that I was 100% convinced that the 1998 Twins were destined to win the World Series). This year, everybody around baseball expected the Twins to be among the best teams in the league. The standings show that they are. They have the fancy stadium and a blend of marquee players, rising stars, and serviceable veterans. All things considered, they are quite similar in makeup to recent champions. Usually, the Twins are in the opposite position. They overachieve and claw their way into the playoffs on fumes and then get swept. This really gets us back to the whole identity crisis of the Twins. They're among the "haves" of baseball. Let's hope they continue to play like it.

July 30

2010-08-15T17:28:00.001-07:00

The Twins are 11-4 since Nick Blackburn went to AAA and Punto went to the DL.

Manager Don Wakamatsu

2010-08-09T19:20:00.000-07:00

The Mariners fired manager Don Wakamatsu. Within the last month, he benched an overpaid middle infielder who can't hit because of mental mistakes and lack of hustle. I'm going to assume manager Don Wakamatsu wanted to bench Figgins earlier but was afraid because of the contract. The Twins could benefit from this line of thinking.

At this point in the road trip, all the yaysayers seem to think 4-3 proves that the Twins are going to win the World Series. To the naysayers it's proof that they have an uphill battle to a division series sweep. All things considered, these games haven't really said much. They should have won at least three in Tampa but could have been swept. Wins are wins but that's all at this point.

Currently, I am happy to have so many unfamiliar faces in the lineup. I'm starting to like Butera. Some day, I'll come to hate Valencia. Face it. He's the second coming of Brian Buscher. I kind of like Repko, too. Meanwhile, I've realized that I hate Casilla and Guerrier so much that I like them. Really, I just love having Punto on the DL and Blackburn in AAA. Too bad Perkins is back.

The Trade

2010-07-30T19:08:00.000-07:00

Usually, I like to rate trades by how excited I am to get rid of the player the Twins traded. This time, I thought I'd try something different. I wanted to see how the other team's fans reacted. So I perused a Washington Nationals blog. I have two new friends:

BSullivan:

Ramos has been an okay minor leaguer. It seems that most of the complements refer to his plus power (which is undeveloped yet) because of his body type. Body Type? That just means fat guy who can potentially swing a stick.

Wxguy:

I’m going to be optimistic, which is hard for me, given the way the Nats are managed,
and I’m going to agree that we must trust Mr. Rizzo. At first, I thought,“Wow interesting trade”.
But then I read the fine print on this trade, hinting that Capps might have asked 7-8mil over his present 3.5mil at arbitration for next year. Then I got pessimistic again. Does this mean that any player with the Nats, who makes the All-stars, is a league leader in saves, and is only 26 years old, will be traded for an untried, usually injured, having a bad minor league season 22 year old rookie catcher? Of course, not to mention that a left handed reliever, who was on his way down from AA to A league, was thrown in for some reason (Did the Nats need a new batting practice pitcher?) And on top of this we give the Twins 500K to boot.

In the spirit of fairness, I suppose I should include a rebuttal from Twins fans:

unicorn4711:

Ramos was the Twins best bargaining chip. He had to go, but really, for a second-rate Rauch? We'll keep this guy for one year, then Nathan will be back as the closer and the Twins will have given up a future all-star catcher for half a season for a new closer that isn't any better than what we've got. BS! Front office: FAIL.

ShanePaulson:

The Twins would have been better off waiting this time. Billy was WAY tooo caviler on this. Was he just trying to prevent Capps going to the ChiSox? Bad move long term for the Twins. Another Garza/Bartlett for Young.

I appreciate Shane's optimistic take on the deal, but I don't think it's that good. Nonetheless, as a rule of thumb, the team that trades a minor league catcher as its main piece of the deal comes out ahead.

The Bunt

2010-07-21T18:56:00.001-07:00

"If it works out, it's bases loaded for [Jason] Kubel -- I like those chances. I'm not feeling the greatest at the plate right now, and that factors in, but that situation, you get two guys in scoring position with Kubel up and one out, I take my chances with that for sure. Perez on the mound is nasty. He throws a cutter the majority of the time. It'll break away from a lefthanded hitter, and he induces a lot of double plays. So if I hit into a double play, you guys are probably talking about that."

I already used the quote from the movie Rudy about Justin Morneau. Instead, I'll rephrase a line which has been attributed to Mark Twain, Abe Lincoln, and others:

"Better to be presumed a wuss than to open your mouth and remove all doubt."

We like Mauer because he's the quintessential Minnesotan. He won't take the last doughnut. Instead, he'll leave it for Kubel. And when he gets mad, he doesn't show it. He's just passive-diddly-aggressive- almost as though he were raised with the University of Minnesota Spankological Protocol. Instead of showing his anger or frustration, he just says, "If I hit into a double play, you guys are probably talking about that."

I guess for $20 million a year, you can get a player who can at least get the bunt down.

Trades

2010-07-12T20:42:00.000-07:00

There's a lot of trade talk these days, so I better state my opinion now. It would be nice to pull of a "Michael's Secret Stuff" deal like the Shannon Stewart trade. A solid lead-off hitter and average defensive player somehow completely turned things around. Even Pavano was a savvy acquisition. I'm not sure how wise it is, but this year, I'd like to see absolutely no move or an complete blockbuster. No move tells the players to get their heads in the game and play better baseball. Otherwise, I want a huge deal that moves at least two significant players. There are only two untouchables: Young and Pavano. For better or worse, Mauer is probably just beyond untouchable. He has the no-trade clause, too, right? That leaves Justin Morneau as a prime candidate to be the centerpiece of such a trade. I have no idea what I want or who I'd trade him for or why it would help the team. I'm angry and I want to blast with dynamite!

Oswalt alone is only enough to get the Twins to another division series loss. If, however, he could manage to turn around just one of Slowey, Blackburn, and Liriano, that changes things. I'm not sure that's possible. It's too late and I'm hungry.

Lineup

2010-07-11T12:54:00.001-07:00

Everybody complains about Gardy's Sunday lineups. Aside from Punto at short, can we make this one permanent? It's amazing what you can string together without Joe hitting into double plays. Now cue the requisite pat themselves on the back for winning one of three. We struggled a little bit there, but we went into the break on a positive note. Now we get a bit of a chance to regroup.

Fair Weather

2010-07-10T07:26:00.000-07:00

Every now and then, I skim through comments on various columns and articles about the Twins. I was somewhat surprised to see relatively few people complaining about the fair weather fans. Being a fan does not mean wearing blinders and insisting that you're team is really good. This team is terrible. That does not mean I do not want to see the Twins win. But I don't want to see them win the way they're playing right now. Instead, I need to see an attitude change. This team should be out to prove that they can win a playoff series. In the back of their minds, I think that's their mission, but they don't seem to think they can do much about that right now. They have taken the "one game at a time" philosophy in the wrong direction. To them, it means if we lose tonight, it's only one game. Instead, every night is a chance to prove that they can win a playoff series. They should play tonight as though they are down two games on the Yankees in the Division Series. Then again, maybe that's a bad idea. History says that means they would lose. But they are battling their tails off out there, pressing, and really getting after it.

Quotes

2010-07-06T19:10:00.000-07:00

"You can find a negative in anything; you can find a positive in anything. I've learned over the course of my career the more often you look at the positive, the better off you're going to be. You can find something negative every single day. You can win a ballgame and come out with something negative. But if you focus on the positive, it doesn't wear you out mentally as much."

"You just summed up your sorry career here in one sentence."

Morneau summarizes what's wrong with the team more than anything else. By his theory, the Twins won a game against one of the top teams in the league this weekend. 'Attaboy, Justin. I'm all for the power of positive thinking, but the Twins seem to take it too far. It's more in the territory of rationalization. They are far more skilled at explaining why a loss is no big deal than they are at winning ballgames. Face it, Justin, if you play better baseball, there won't be so much negative to drag you down. If all the positive thinking prevents mental exhaustion, why do check out for the season in August? Maybe all that positive thinking convinces you to pace yourself for three more months of baseball. Remember the time you were so busy focusing on that positive mammoth home run at Miller Park that you couldn't hit and had to be sent back to AAA?

A few weeks ago, Cubs pitcher Carlos Zambrano threw a temper tantrum and blamed his first baseman for allowing the home runs. The Twins organization- management, players, the media, and fans- prides itself on not having that type of player on the roster. But do you know what? Carlos cared. I don't care if it was selfish because he wanted a better ERA or unselfish because he wanted to win. He cared. Things went poorly. He got mad. Is that too much to ask? I'd love to see that kind of spark in a Twins uniform. Heck, as long as people are talking deals, I'd love to see Carlos Zambrano in a Twins uniform. Yes, you saw that correctly. I suggested trading for Carlos Zambrano.

Trades

2010-07-03T16:25:00.000-07:00

The trade deadline is approaching. I started thinking about all of the ridiculous proposals I've seen on blogs and message boards. You know, the "let's trade Blackburn and Punto for Pujols" type deals. Swapping a starting pitcher with an ERA around 4.00 and light-hitting defensively challenged middle infielder for an MVP seems completely ridiculous. Of course, Blackburn's ERA is nowhere near 4.00 this season. Blackburn would have to pitch out of his mind to match his numbers from '08 and '09. But Matt Garza is on pace to finish the season with about 200 innings and an ERA of 4.00- just like Blackburn has done twice. Jason Bartlett is hitting even worse than Punto. Currently, Pujols is hitting .306 with 19 HRs and 59 RBI's. Delmon Young is hitting .296 with 9 HR's and 54 RBI's. In addition to the advantage in power, Pujols is also drawing more walks with about a .100 point OBP advantage. Young is certainly not Pujols, but he's certainly playing well enough that it actually makes sense to compare the players. I swore to myself that I would never again evaluate this trade, but when I noticed how similar it looks to some of the absurd suggestions- at least for the moment- I had to acknowledge it.

Cuddyer at Third

2010-07-01T19:26:00.000-07:00

I'm sure Cuddyer's return to third base has delighted members of the blogosophere. I am not pleased by switch. Is Rush Limbaugh the one who says "follow the money" to analyze any situation? With Ron Gardenhire, just follow the Punto. Then it all makes sense.

Bill Smith and Ron Gardenhire have been playing chess with the lineup since the end of last season. Smith gave Gardy almost no option to keep Delmon Young on the bench. But during interleague play, Gardy moved Cuddyer to third in order to keep the best bats in the lineup. This gets everybody used to Cuddyer at third again. If Cuddyer is at third, then Kubel is in the outfield. If Kubel is in the outfield, all four outfield options on the Twins are in the game. If there are four outfield options in the game, then the Twins need another outfielder. (This much has already happened. My brother could vouch that I saw this coming). When JJ Hardy returns, he'll get his spot back at shortstop. Nick Punto battles out there. He plays great defense for us. He runs around the bases pretty well, too. He's versatile, so we'll find a way to work him in there. Gardy will want to play Punto at third to improve defense. He'll want to keep Cuddyer's bat in the lineup. Cuddyer is versatile. I think he's played just about every position for us at some point. He played right field before. We'll still run him out there now and then. This means Jason Kubel needs a place to go. Kubel will move to left and Young will sit on the bench. Checkmate. Gardy can now bench Delmon Young in order to work Nicky in there. If Gardy could manage a baseball game with this much foresight, I don't think we'd have the pitchers getting so many at bats in American League ballparks. Follow the Punto.

Catching Up

2010-06-29T18:11:00.001-07:00

This time, my excuse is actually that I've been so busy following the Twins, I haven't had a chance to post. I was in Milwaukee last week for the last two games of the series. First of all, Miller Park is terrible. The Metrodome was a better place for a ballgame. Punto is still terrible. Gardy seems to be getting dumber by the day. I still cling to the hope that Gardy is actually a maniacal genius who foresaw the late season collapse and brilliant orchestrated a preemptive meltdown to prevent it.

Of course, Nick Blackburn is terrible too. I'm almost starting to hate him more than Punto. Somebody should tell him that he still has quite a ways to go on the terrible scale. In 14 starts, Sean Bergman threw 68 innings and allowed 73 runs for an ERA over 9. Over part of two season, Mike Lincoln compiled a 7.70 ERA in nearly 100 innings. Kyle Lohse may actually prove to be the most fair comparison. The numbers are similar. Both are capable of pitching quite well, but generally don't. I guess we can only hope Blackburn gets his act together.

The Rules

2010-06-11T17:21:00.001-07:00

So Nicky admits he doesn't know the rules. It's an obscure rule, so I'm almost willing to excuse his ignorance. But we're always told about how he's a valuable player because he does the little things- the intangibles. He always gives you a great effort out there. He hustles. He sure didn't look like he was in any hurry to cross the plate. Manny Ramirez may be able to get away with whimsical baserunning, but when you've spent most of your career around the Mendoza Line, you should hustle on any play. Anybody who has watched or played baseball for any amount of time should know that odd things happen. I challenge anybody to find me a circumstance in which the run is less likely to count if you sprint home instead of lazily trotting.

If you paid me however many millions of dollars they are paying him to throw the ball into the outfield, I would study the rule book every single night- in the season and the offseason. Again, this is doubly true for an "intangible" player like Punto. Without fundamentals like knowledge of the rules, what value is he? Perhaps somebody should explain to him that if a fielder catches a batted ball before it hits the ground, then the batter is out. A lot of guys in the dugout don't know that rule. If the batter hits a ball to the pitcher, he throws to the first baseman who tags the base before the runner reaches the base, then the batter is out- even if he slides headfirst into the base.

As I'm writing, I proved myself wrong. If a runner is on second base and the ball is hit to an infielder, if you sprint home you will probably be tagged out.

Twins vs. Royals

2010-06-08T17:10:00.000-07:00

The Twins finished a disappointing road trip. (Yes, it was disappointing. Sure, they took 2 of 3 from Oakland, but they lost 3 of 4 in Seattle). Now they "get" to play the Royals. The Royals have actually had the best record in the division over the past few weeks. Anything less than a sweep would be a pleasant surprise.

Mendoza Alert

2010-06-06T13:10:00.000-07:00

Presently, Nick Putno (that's a typographical error. He's not worthy of correcting it) is hitting .206. He's 22/107. That means he's just an 0-3 away from the Mendoza line. He'll probably get three or four at-bats today. I can't imagine he'll get a hit in any of those, so he should be below .200 by sunset tonight. If not, he can go 1-8 over the next two games to be squarely at .200. How low can he go? They don't seem to have much of a viable alternative, so this winter, we'll find out just how much they value a .060 hitting aging utility player who is not particularly impressive at any position in the field. (For the math wizards out there, try to figure out how I arrived at the .060 number).

This infield is just depressing. I wanted to suggest trying Thome at first. Then I realized that it would be completely pointless. They have no other options on the bench, so we'd be stuck with Danny Valencia or Brendan Harris at DH. I suppose in a day game after a night game, they could DH Mauer and put Thome at first. Could he really do more damage in the field than one of those crappy infielders can do at the plate? I realize the starters are hurt, but is it too much to ask to have one respectable reserve?

Day and Night

2010-05-30T10:02:00.001-07:00

What kind of lineup will Gardy trot out there for a night game against a lefty I've never heard of after a day game against a reliever turned starter who would have pitched a heckuva game for them if Delmon Young had done things the Twins way and tried to hit it the opposite way on a day that's usually a day game after a night game? As an added bonus, it's a night game before traveling to the west coast to play a night game on a holiday.

Clearly, Orlando Hudson and Delmon Young have not been fully initiated into the Twins way of doing things. When CJ Wilson is tossing a shut-out having at some point retired 12 consecutive hitters, when the batter ahead of you hits a 2-out single in the 6th inning, you draw a walk or hit a single to set up the heart of the order (to unceremoniously ground out to second base). You most definitely do not hit a 2-run home run to tie the game. Likewise, in the next inning, if the starter begins with a walk, double, and walk, and you are facing the new relief pitcher with the bases loaded and nobody out, you certainly do not try to pull the ball on the first pitch and hit a double to score two runs and break the game open. That's just not how we do things on this club. We take it the opposite way and GIDP. Popping up to second while trying to hit a sacrifice fly is also acceptable. Just make sure the next batter doesn't hit a double. And once you've hit that double, you certainly shouldn't run through a stop sign at third to score from second on a lazy fly-ball behind a drawn-in infield. The appropriate time to take the extra base would be when you are on second, and the batter hits a ground ball to the shortstop.

Twins Baseball

2010-05-28T20:03:00.000-07:00

Does anything say Twins baseball better than winning 2-1 with Nick Punto scoring on a Joe Mauer bases-loaded, no-out GIDP?

Reality

2010-05-23T07:07:00.000-07:00

Blowing a 6-2 lead is nothing new. Some point the finger at Twins manager Ron Gardenhire on that one. They claim he should have called closer Jon Rauch. I just ask why use Ron Mahay in any situation that could possibly matter? All things considered, though, I would like to think a manager could play eeny-meeny-miny-moe and pick a pitcher who could get three outs before surrendering four runs.

In the bottom of the inning, however, Gardy completely mismanaged the situation. One out. Runners on second and third. Nick Punto is on-deck. A rookie infielder playing in his second MLB game is due up. Nick Punto is on deck. To me, there are two perfectly legitimate ways to handle this. (I was not following the game at this point, but from past situations with Gardy, I usually do think of these before he works his madness).

1. Let Plouffe hit. Best-case scenario, he's a hero in his second game and drives in the winning run. Worst-case scenario, he gets out. In that case, there are two outs, runners on second and third, a light-hitting middle infielder at bat, a respectable- albeit not terrifying hitter (Span) on-deck, and Jim Thome and Brendan Harris on the bench. Brewers manager Ken Macha has no choice but to play the Plouffe at bat for this situation. If Plouffe gets out, he's pitching to Jim Thome with the winning run on third. If Plouffe walks, he's pitching to Jim Thome with one out and the bases loaded. Surely, the Brewers don't want that, so Plouffe could probably expect to see mostly strikes in his at-bat. Thome actually could have helped the rookie more by not pinch-hitting for him.

2. Pinch hit Harris for Plouffe. The only difference with this and option 1 is that you have a veteran hitting instead of a rookie.

Instead, Gardy pinch-hit Thome for Plouffe and let Punto strikeout. What troubles me most about this is what it says about Gardy's image of Punto. One possibility is that Gardy fails to see how little Punto intimidates opposing managers. The thought that they might walk Thome to face Punto never crossed his mind. Meanwhile, the Brewers coaches were struggling to keep a straight face. But this is what I expect was going through Gardy's mind:

If I pinch hit Thome-y, then they'll walk him to get to Nicky. But little do they know that Nicky is my secret weapon. I'll have him batting with the bases load, the winning run on third, and one out. Mwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!!!

Instead, Nicky struck out the game lasted a few more innings and the bullpen is depleted for today. Of course, one irony here is that if they had more bench players, they might have won in nine innings and saved a few relievers for today.

Jeopardy

2010-05-22T10:30:00.001-07:00

This week's Jeopardy Tournament of Champions featured a "Yankee Stadium Moments" category. The first though which popped into my head was, "Who is Mike Trombley?" Alas, neither that nor "Who is David Wells?" were correct responses.

The Twins seem to have begun one of their favorite trends. Play generally mediocre baseball with sporadic wins that they try to count as more than one game. They lost two in New York before "conquering their demons" with Kubel's grand slam. That was one of two victories on the road trip. Then they returned to Target Field and scored more runs in one evening- maybe even an inning- than the entire road trip. (Note, I did not fact-check this claim. That I decided not to bother reflects my opinion of the offense on the trip).

It's tempting to use this trip to measure the Twins against the Yankees and the Red Sox. But what about the Blue Jays? The Twins began the road trip with a 9-22 mark against the Blue Jays since 2006. That's half a game worse than their record against the Yankees over the same span (9-21). The Twins struggles with the Blue Jays are perhaps more troubling. At first, it's frustrating because it's easy to group the Blue Jays with such franchises as Baltimore, Pittsburgh, and Kansas City. In reality, they certainly belong on a higher tier than those franchises- but certainly not the same tier as the Twins. After all, the Twins have won all those American League Central division titles, right?

In reality, the Toronto Blue Jays are probably the most similar team to the Twins in all of Major League Baseball. Both won a World Series or two in the early 90's. Both struggled in the middle of that decade. Both played in an out-of-date domed stadium during the construction era. Over the last 10 years, both typically had win totals in the 80's. What's the difference between these two teams? Why are the Blue Jays overlooked while the Twins are at least mentioned among baseball's elite? These questions answer themselves. The Blue Jays compete with Tampa, New York, Baltimore, and Boston. The Twins compete with Cleveland, Chicago, Kansas City, and Detroit. Cleveland and Tampa should be a reasonable fair comparison, though Tampa has certainly had the edge recently. Likewise, Kansas City and Baltimore are quite similar. What about the other teams? Sure, Detroit and Chicago have played in the World Series. But the worst years from Boston and New York are normal seasons for the Tigers and White Sox.

That leaves the Twins and the Blue Jays. Over the past two seasons, the Blue Jays have a 47-28 record against the American League Central. Meanwhile, the Twins have nearly the opposite record against the American League East: 23-44. If the Twins swapped places with the Blue Jays, Toronto would routinely need at most 162 games to win a division title. Whereas, Minnesota would barely edge Baltimore for fourth place. Feel free to draw your own conclusions.

Manager Trey Hillman

2010-05-14T15:55:00.000-07:00

This Royals dismissed manager Trey Hillman earlier this week. By my count, Twins manager Ron Gardenhire has won four games against Hillman and the Royals in 2010. Meanwhile, during his entire tenure as manager, Gardenhire has 9 regular season wins against the Yankees. I've seen the hype about how this weekend is a "statement" series and how this year the Twins have the talent to beat the Yankees. First of all, the 2010 version is just the 2010 team with marginal improvements in the middle infield. Secondly, the Twins have always had the talent to beat the Yankees. While Gardy has managed the Twins, the Yankees have lost over 400 games. Evidently, somebody out there is beating the Yankees. The Yankees are just another team, and this is just another series. Paradoxically, that's exactly what makes it so different.

Let's hope Kubel can climb out of his slump before Gardy permanently benches Young in order to give Kubel enough at bats to get going. Remember how much Gardy used to hate Kubel? I wonder if he still does. I tip my cap to Billy Smith. When Gardy fills out the lineup card, Gardy has to use at least one player he hates. To bench Young and Kubel, he would have to play somebody out of position and use Harris or Casilla. Maybe Nick Punto is a just a pacifier. I guess one perk of having Punto as an everyday player is there is no looming threat of who Gardy will bench for making Nicky look bad.

Day One

2010-05-02T09:16:00.000-07:00

Nick Punto: 0-4, 1K
Luke Hughes: 2-7, 1 HR, 1 RBI, 1R, 3K

He's Back

2010-05-01T06:24:00.001-07:00

The Twins activated Nick Punto from the disabled list and sent Luke Hughes back to AAA Rochester. In two games, Hughes went 2-7 with a HR, an RBI, and 3 K's. We will be monitoring Nick Punto closely over the next two months to see exactly when he matches that output. Okay, so the strike outs should be done by about the 8th inning tonight. But it could take until June for him to get a hit and a home run. (Actually, if I know Nicky, he'll really get after it tonight with a couple of hits for us and then go O-fer the rest of May).

Apparently, the Twins just finished one of (if not the) best ever month of April. At this point, I'm worried that Wednesday's loss to the Tigers will be the story of the season. Last night, the won against Cleveland in what appeared to be a decisive game. Remember, though, that the Twins loaded the bases with nobody out in the second inning. Harris struck out. Next Denard Span grounded into an inning ending double play. Then the first baseman dropped the ball and the Twins scored 3 runs. How much of the Twins success to this point has been given to them? It's certainly positive that they can translate gifts into wins but they need to start winning their own games. (One could argue that to this point that has not been possible because the opposition has played that poorly, though).

Veteran catcher Mike Redmond anchoring a lineup of Mendozas brings back painful memories.

Luke Hughes

2010-04-28T17:36:00.000-07:00

Luke Hughes has moved to within 11 HR's of injured Twins infielder Nick Punto on the all-time home run list.

Excitement

2010-04-23T18:35:00.000-07:00

I'm not as excited as I usually am when Punto lands on the DL. Even with Harris struggling, I'm happy to have Punto out of the lineup. At least they didn't call up Tolbert. How many more hits will Nicky have in his first two weeks off the DL than he does during his stint on the DL?

Injuries

2010-04-18T06:20:00.001-07:00

One trait for which I often praise Nick Punto is his tendency for injuries. This weekend, I realize have realized the downside. He's rarely fully injured. Instead, he's just "dinged-up" or "sore" or something to that effect. He's incapacitated enough to be unavaliable for about 4 games, but not enough that they would put him on the DL. (I, of course, would argue that he's always incapacitated enough to justify a stint on the DL). Punto's injury interferes with other decisions about the lineup. In order to have a reserve infielder, outfielder, and catcher, Jim Thome must DH leaving either Kubel or Young on the bench. Technically, they have to do that regardless of Punto's health, but with Alexi's "versatility" it's not nearly so critical to have an outfielder in reserve. I'm happy with any combination of Kubel, Young, and Thome covering LF and DH provided Kubel and Young get most of the at-bats. But I am not fine with that decision being made because the Twins insist on carrying an overpaid utility infielder who can't even stay healthy enough to hit .196 in 500 at bats. It's also tougher to use one of these three as a pinch-hitter late in the game. With Punto out of the lineup, there's not much need, but I would feel better with Thome than Harris. Nonetheless, they are better without Punto than with Punto. Because this way, Gardy can't pinch hit Punto for Young because "Nicky hits the ball pretty good against this guy." (This means, of course, that Punto went 2-4 against him 6 years ago and has since gone 0-8).

Neighbor

2010-04-04T19:40:00.000-07:00

On Saturday, I had a chat with my neighbor about the upcoming Twins season. He's in his upper 80's, so he's seen a lot of Twins baseball. I could not help but chuckle at his outlook on the team this year: "It's the same team as last year, only it's more expensive." Can you really dispute that? Although I thought they handled the offseason pretty well, he raises an excellent point. How can expectations be dramatically different when the personnel is exactly the same? Last year, at this time, he told me, "They're a .500 ballclub." They were a little better than that, so if the trend continues, maybe they'll win a game in the division series this year.

Third Base

2010-04-01T19:58:00.001-07:00

I had thought there would at least be a chance that Twins manager Ron Gardenhire would opt to only play 8 players in the field and take the automatic out every time the 9th spot came up in the batting order. Instead, he wants errant throws into right field after the batter has passed first base and popped up bunts. Look on the bright side. By beginning the season as a starter, he is more likely to suffer a season ending injury. I was about to say that it means he can't bench Hardy or Hudson because that would mean playing Harris. But then I remembered Casilla. You can't blame Alexi, though. Time and again he has seen that sloppy defense and a low batting average earn playing time.

Outdoor Baseball

2010-03-31T17:47:00.000-07:00

Will there be a better week for outdoor baseball in Minnesota than the last week before it begins? The concern regarding facing the elements in a Minnesota April remains valid. For me, this week's weather says the risk is worth it. Sure, it was 10 degrees in April a few years ago, but this time it's 70 in March.

Time is ticking for me to name the rest of my all Metrodome team. The outfield was tough. A "Soul Patrol" of Jones, Hunter, and Stewart or Lawton was tempting. Likewise, I hate to omit Rich Becker and Alex Cole. I insist on having one from each position. With all due respect to Torii, I have to pick Puckett in center. Marty Cordova represents the mid 1990's in left. His 24 HR rookie of the year campaign gave Twins fans hope for the last half of the decade. Of course, his production faded almost as fast as the Twins. Finally, much like Pat Meares, Michael Cuddyer has quietly defined an era of Twins baseball in right field.

The choice for the pitcher is obvious. Officially, I'm not even naming an All Metrodome team. I'm just naming an All Metrodome player. He pitched to Matt Walbeck, Greg Myers, Terry Steinbach, AJ Pierzynksi, and countless others. He took turns starting with Kevin Tapani, Scott Erickson, Rick Aguilera, LaTroy Hawkins, Frankie Rodriguez, Sean Bergmann, Bob Tewksbury, Joe Mays, Mark Redman, Kyle Lohse, Rick Reed, Matt Kinney, Kenny Rogers, Francisco Liriano, Carlos Silva, and even Scott Baker. Eric Milton tossed a no-hitter and Johan Santanna won a Cy Young award during his time in the rotation. He turned the ball over to the likes of Pat Mahomes, Mike Trombley, Rick Aguilera, Eddie Guardado, LaTroy Hawkins, Bob Wells, Hector Carrasco, Tony Fiore, Joe Nathan, and Matt Guerrier. Nearly any player considered for the All Metrodome Team shared the clubhouse with him.

Brad Radke's career touched almost all of the Metrodome era of Twins baseball. He played with Puckett and pitched to Joe Mauer. No matter how hopeless the mid and late 90's were, I always knew we were never more than 4 games away from Brad Radke. That didn't just mean a chance of winning. That meant winning. He won 20 games on a team that won 68. Sure he gave up run early- occasionally in the first inning- but when you really needed him, he would throw a masterpiece. Was anything quite like watching him carve the strike zone armed with nothing but an 88 mph fastball, a change-up, and willpower?

Hot Dogs

2010-03-10T19:03:00.001-08:00

This week, the Twins announced what type of hot dogs they will serve at Target Field. I was disappointed that they did not reveal that Nick Punto has been reassigned to sell hot dogs. Joe Nathan may miss the season. I seem to remember a few years ago, that the Twins decided to use a no-name middle inning reliever as a closer and it worked out okay.

I'll have to read it again to convince myself, but I don't think Souhan took a single pot-shot at Delmon Young in his column which wonders if the Twins should consider trading Mauer. Most people think the Twins have to sign Mauer. To me, the solution is painfully obvious. Do both. Sure, those deals are usually contingent on signing an extension. But think of how angry you would be if the Twins let Mauer go. Don't you think other teams fans would be just as mad if they learned their GM turned down a deal for Joe Mauer? Learn from the Joe Smith deal and handle everything over the table. Don't tell him what you're doing. Don't even tell Gardy. Just call him into the office, tell him his been traded. Play the season and offer him so much money he has to take it. There's nothing remotely underhanded about it. It's just a gambit. Sure, the other team may get the first chance to sign him long term. But it reminds Joe that he's not in charge here. That's really the important thing. The front office must handle this decisively or they will get burned. Then again, I've heard Alexi Casilla is rather versatile. Will he be catching in 2011?

Weight Loss

2010-03-07T15:40:00.000-08:00

Delmon Young showed up at camp 30 pounds lighter than last season. The weight loss was completely his own decision. Every baseball season seems to feature some player showing up to camp in better shape. Usually, somebody writes an article about how great the subsequent season will be for the player. How often does the improved physical condition actually pay dividends? Remember when Boof Bonser lost weight? I do not doubt that the lighter frame could help Young- especially chasing down balls in the outfield. I'm mostly just curious what happens to these players.

The most encouraging sign for Young is not his weight, anyway. Manager Ron Gardenhire actually seems to like the outfielder this year. This season, Young enters camp expected to play everyday in left-field. As you can infer from my complaints about Nick Punto, I expect all players to perform. But by arriving at camp with a well-defined role, Young can focus his energy on excelling within that role. Remember, this is a job for the players. From the comments by Young, Gardy, and others, it sounds like expectations were not communicated clearly. Certainly, immaturity contributed to Young pressuring himself to perform when he was in the lineup. But how much effort did Gardy make to explain to Young what his role was with the team? We'll never know because we were not in the clubhouse. I'm just happy that it seems like it's solved for this year- that is until I start reading between the lines of comments by Gardenhire and Twins General Manager regarding the "versatility" of Alexi Casilla. For now, I'll do my best to ignore it.

Hardy and Hudson

2010-03-04T18:16:00.000-08:00

Today, I saw a picture of the "Twins new double play combination" sitting in the dugout and laughing. The caption implies that the pair will be the primary middle infield for the Twins in 2010. I fear the picture may be sadly prophetic: These two will ride the pine when Gardy decides to bench them in favor of Tolbert and Casilla. By the end of May, the official scorer will charge Hardy with an error for booting a ball in the hole which likely would have been a single anyway. Casilla will go 3-4 with a double and a home run in a 7-2 Twins loss. Hudson will go 0-5 in between 2-4 and 2-3 games. Tolbert with make a diving stop in the hole, but the runner will beat the throw by half a step. Gardy will interpret this as Hardy and Hudson going through a bit of a slump while Tolbert has been playing great defense for us. And Alexi-y has been knocking the ball around pretty well for us lately. (That 3-4 game will bring him to 4-30).

If you ask why Punto is not considered in this scenario, shame on you. You know exactly where he'll be. Unless we could be so lucky that he hurt himself sliding headfirst into first base after popping up a bunt.

Census 2010 and "Small" Markets

2010-02-28T12:27:00.001-08:00

A recent Sports Illustrated article (Hope Springs Eternal, Feb. 22) describes the Twins as a model for small market success. As Nelson Muntz of the Simpsons said after viewing Naked Lunch, "I can think of at least two things wrong with that title." The Twins "success" has been mostly a result of the collective ineptitude of the White Sox, Tigers, Royals, and Indians. Although, that's not really true. The Tigers reached a World Series and the Indians had the Red Sox beaten in the ALCS a few years ago. Meanwhile, both Tampa and Colorado have recently reached the World Series. Heck, Tampa won a division which includes both the Yankees and Red Sox.

The article inadvertently highlights the meaninglessness of the term "small-market." It refers to the St. Louis Cardinals as one of "game's top grossers." A list by Forbes confirms this. I checked some Census data about the Saint Louis metropolitan area. The total population is lower than the Twin Cities by at least half a million people. (The Twin Cities have close to 3,000,000 whereas Saint Louis is no more than about 2,500,000). Moreover, the per capita income of the Saint Louis area is about $5000 lower than the Twin Cities ($29,000 to $34,000). If there are more people with more money in the Twin Cities, then how can the market be the problem? The Twins marketing department loves to convince fans that the team faces a competitive disadvantage. It's much easier to sell Nick Punto as a third baseman when the entire PR campaign aims for nothing more than low expectations.

If Saint Louis is a "big" market, then the only excuse for the Twins would be the stadium. But they built their new stadium and spent all of last season telling us how much greener the pastures (sorry for the pun) would be next year. Who will their next scapegoat be? Will they blame fans for not spending enough money? Maybe if Mauer goes they'll try to blame the "rich" teams. Or the "unfair" lack of a salary cap. If he stays, they'll blame his contract. Well, I shouldn't give them these ideas. If they want my money, they have to convince me that they are making an honest effort to build a world championship club.

Returning to Form

2010-02-17T19:07:00.001-08:00

Is any phrase more tiring than hoping a player with return to form? It's just a code saying that a player had one good year and we're supposed to delude ourselves into thinking it should be expected. Of course, the yaysayers and Twins Propaganda Machine would try to argue the reverse about our favorite infielder. They insist we are judging Punto by one bad year. They are half-right. In his 5 seasons of roughly 400 or more at-bats, he's hit .239, .290, .210, .284, and .228. Even in '08 when he hit .284, he still looked like a .225 hitter. He just had way too many terrible at-bats. I wish I was beating a dead horse, but there are still way too many apologists out there keeping it alive.

Of course, the STRIB had a story about JJ Hardy "returning to form" today. I don't care what form he returns to. He's not Nick Punto. I feel bad for Hardy though. He'll boot a grounder on which he has no play to make the out anyway. He'll get in Gardy's dog house. (He'll need a bigger one this year). Then Gardy will run Puntosy out there for some defense. Plus he looked at [Nick's] numbers against this guy, and he hits him pretty well. (2-6 in 2006). Unless of course, Gardy returns to form.

The Offseason

2010-02-15T19:29:00.000-08:00

Spring training approaches and the offseason winds down. The Twins quietly assembled some new faces in the infield. On paper at least, an infield of Harris, Hardy, and Hudson looks downright serviceable. Alas, the only reason to keep Gardy from benching them is his quest to have a roster consisting solely of scrappy infielders. He can't start Tolbert, Punto, and Casilla in the outfield if any of them are playing in the infield. (I can't remember- Did I publicly suggest Delmon Young play second base? Or did I just think it? Either way, it's less ridiculous than any of those options in the outfield). The backup catcher departed and they gave veteran slugger Jim Thome a chance. Undoubtedly, the most positive outcome of the winter was that they didn't sign Chone Figgins. I love it when I'm wrong about the Twins. It just seemed so dumb that it was inevitable. On the flip side, they only have a month a half left to release Nick Punto before the season opens. This at least buys me time to decide how bold of an ultimatum I dare issue in the event that he starts the opener- heck any game- at Target Field. Maybe Gardy thinks that by playing Punto, then Punto will never become a manager who obsessively plays lousy utility infielders.

Jacque Jones

2010-02-09T18:54:00.001-08:00

Forgive me for saying this, but I'm excited by the news that the Twins signed the outfielder to a minor league deal. Of former players with even a remotely realistic chance of returning, Chuck Knoblauch is about the only one who could intrigue me more. After all the two-hoppers to second and flailing strikeouts, it's easy to forget that Jones was one of the most productive hitters from 1999-2003; any other player over that era had at least one terrible year. Of course, every year since then, Jones has been worse than a young Doug Mientkiewicz. With any luck, opposing managers have forgotten how to pitch to him and he can be an effective reserve outfielder. If not, it's no big loss. I hope he does well enough that they bring back the old commercial: "Jones turns oun it! He's rounding the bases to the delight of the crowd..." You know. The one with the guy sitting in the toilet stall that shows him with pants around his ankles tapping his feet around as if circling the bases. Much better than the wet toilet paper "high heat" ads.

Even more delightfully, the Mets claimed Jason Pridie off of waivers. Good riddance.

Perkins and Arbitration

2010-02-03T19:41:00.000-08:00

Apparently Twins left-handed pitcher Glen Perkins is upset that he failed to qualify for arbitration because he finished the season in AAA. At first, I thought, "Well, you should have thought about that when you lost the game in the top of the first or blew up in the 6th." Then I realized that anybody who was pitching in his place did exactly the same thing. Maybe that's his case. He was just trying to do like everybody else.

Speaking of everybody, Francisco "I Sure Hope He's not the Franchise" Liriano has been pitching the heck of winter ball. He should be well on his way to throwing hall of fame bullpen sessions by May.

I wanted to air my grievances about the pitching staff and sadly realized that it would be a complete re-run from last year. I can't remember any of their names, and a disgruntled White Sox fan said it best in 2002: "You're worse than the guy last night." The grounds crew on Major League wasn't too far off, either. Aside from the pitching, Punto, Tolbert, and Casilla I think I like this team.

Jim Thome

2010-01-27T18:56:00.000-08:00

Apparently, the Twins have signed veteran slugger Jim Thome. First, I thought, "He originally played third base for Cleveland." Next, I wondered, "Where's Rick Reed these days?" Seen in the proper context, this is a great move for the Twins. I have not read much of the hype, but I hope the organization is not trying to claim (or even imply) that he will play everyday and drive in 100 RBI's. Think of Jim Thome as upgrading from Mike Redmond. He's a mostly worthless benchwarmer at the end of his career that you just can't help but love. Even with too many pitchers, they resorted to such stiffs as Brian Buscher to fill bench spots last season. What does it hurt to have Thome? If nothing else, he provides manager Ron Gardenhire a veteran option to run the bases in late innings if he wants somebody experienced enough to know to stop at third on a grounder to the shortstop.

How can you not love Jim Thome? This is the player, who when asked about becoming the Cleveland Indians all-time home-run leader, responded, "The best part is that I did it all with the same team." My friends at baseballreference.com tell me that he made his debut against the 1991 Minnesota Twins. That has to mean something. I'll never forget when the 2002 Twins beat the Indians 23-2 with Thome doing his best by adding 2 solo home runs. My fact-checker is on vacation this week, but wasn't it Thome who hit the shot to eliminate the 2008 Twins? I'm excited!

The Vikings

2010-01-18T17:39:00.000-08:00

Today, I skimmed over an article regarding the Vikings victory over the Cowboys. The story mentioned that this will be the first NFC Championship series for the Vikings in 9 years. That sounded like a long time. Then I remembered that the last time the Vikings played in the NFC Championship was almost 10 years after the Twins last won a World Series and less than two years before the last time the Twins reached the ALCS. Those were both good eras for the Twins, but it's time for somebody drag the trophy behind his car in the Target Field parking lot.

Apparently Mike Redmond has signed with the Indians. In the one game playoff with the Indians, will somebody remind Gardy to bring the infield in when facing Redmond in the 9th?

They signed some pitcher today, too. I'm sorry, but I just can't get excited enough to have anything to say about him.

Bill Smith

2010-01-06T18:33:00.000-08:00

Considering I will repeat most of my grievances from last year, Bill Smith seems the perfect opening target. I believe in the "addition by subtraction" theory to building a baseball team. It's not about who you get in the off-season, but who you get rid of. Last year, he failed to remove Nick Punto from the Twins roster. Then every day thereafter, he decided not to designate the infielder for assignment or buy out his contract. Think about it. In the scope of the Twins payroll, $4 million a year to keep him from trying to score from second on a grounder to short is a pretty good use of money. A few players will be gone, but can you really credit the GM for Bonser? He hurt himself last year, so it's no different. Who else is gone? I'm not even sure. But why should we expect a mediocre roster from 2009 to do anything other than win 86 games in 2010? The Twins Propaganda Machine will try the "more experienced" argument. Didn't they try that last season? If more faces change among the minor role players change, it's much easier as a fan to delude myself that this year they might have a chance. Bring in a Butch Huskey or Jeff Cirillo. I just need a few more players that I don't hate yet. That shortstop we got from the Brewers doesn't quite satisfy that.

Traditions

2009-12-23T19:13:00.000-08:00

I can't bring myself to closely monitor the baseball off-season. Nothing happens that I can't learn by spending five minutes skimming over an offseason summary and preseason preview. (Although, occasionally my fact checkers have informed me that certain left-handed relief pitchers are no longer members of the Twins roster). By this point of winter, I start wanting baseball back- no matter how much I expect the Twins to disappoint. Is "expected disappointment" an oxymoron?

I'm told that my reader enjoyed last season's "Airing of Grievances." Today is Festivus, and I thought there would be no better way to switch from 2009 to 2010 with what will be the second annual airing of grievances. I think I still need to name my All Metrodome outfield.

I don't know where to begin the grievances, so I'll start with the obvious: Who tries to score from second base on a grounder to the shortstop? There's only one infielder in the league who could possibly mess up that play. And what am I going to do about all of the pitchers?

Pinto

2009-11-22T14:11:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, during a conversation with two friends, we realized that collectively, the three of us had attempted something eight times but succeeded only once. I remarked that our rate of success qualifies us to play infield for the Twins. One of the others, who does not follow baseball closely, responded, "You're referring to somebody in particular. Just a second. I'll think of the... PINTO! Is it Pinto?" I had intended for my comment to apply to Buscher, Tolbert, and Casilla as well, but the characterization of the piranha as a sub-compact car with no rear fender and a gas tank prone to explosions struck me.

Meanwhile, rumors and suggestions fly about potential free agent moves during the off season. I expect to see Chone Figgins playing third for the Twins next year. The Twins certainly know that fans lost patience with the instability at the hot corner a few seasons ago. The signing of a big-name player symbolically shows fans the organization's commitment to building a winner, while maintaining the traditional Twins image because "he plays our style of baseball."

He will likely flounder in a Twins uniform; he has hit for respectable average, but his game is primarily speed and defense. Similar players for the Angels- Izturis and Aybar- have had similar numbers. Similar players for the Twins have flirted with the Mendoza line. I doubt there can be much difference between Twins speedy infielders and those for the Angels. That leads me to wonder about quality of coaching for the Twins. It may take the Twins a few months to do the damage, but even at career year he'd be way too expensive- which is exactly why I expect it to happen. The Twins best hope is that the Mets outbid for him like the Lions did with Scott Mitchell. I suppose at the very least, he knows not to try to score from second on a grounder to short.

Hindsight

2009-11-07T05:39:00.001-08:00

I wish I were disappointed at the news that the Twins traded outfielder Carlos Gomez to the Brewers for shortstop JJ Hardy. Instead, I immediately thought, "This might mean they'll keep Delmon Young." That's a fitting follow-up to, "At least they got more for Garza than Johan."

Many Twins followers had wanted the outfielder to spend the season in AAA. I do not recall arguing a strong position for or against the option, but in hindsight, it clearly was the right thing to do. A dime-a-dozen Jason Tyner type could have done as much for the Twins in 2009 as Gomez and regular at bats and focused coaching in Rochester may have helped to transform Gomez from the bad halves of Pedro Cerrano and Willie Mays Hays to their respective good sides. The move ultimately doesn't mean a whole lot, and still fails to address the top priority for the Twins this offseason.

The article in the Star and Tribune includes a disappointing, albeit unsurprising, description of offseason plans for the Twins. "Smith didn’t rule out pursuing a second or third baseman but noted manager Ron Gardenhire’s preference to have Nick Punto in the lineup." I'm going to take the positive interpretation of this. Smith has realized that if Punto is on the roster, Gardy will play him. If Smith realizes this, that means he knows how simple it is to solve the Punto problem. Get rid of him. Even if this befuddles Gardy so badly when he's filling out the lineup card that they end up with Matt Tolbert in centerfield, no DH, and Kevin Slowey batting fifth, it's worth it.

When I broke the news of the trade to my 86-year-old neighbor, he said it best. "They already have a shortstop who can hit .225." At least this one won't try to score from second on a grounder to short.

OLERUD BREAKS FOR THIRD!!!

2009-10-11T18:48:00.000-07:00

For those who are following on television instead of the radio, here's what you just missed:

"... PUNTO'S GOING TO TRY TO SCORE!!! JETER! AND BACK TO THIRD... OHHHHHHHHHHH, NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Argh.

Game Two

2009-10-11T06:22:00.000-07:00

It took 163 regular season games and 2 playoff games, but I finally figured out the 2009 Minnesota Twins. They can, but they don't. In Friday evening's loss to the Yankees, they proved that they can beat the Yankees, but ultimately lost the game. A serviceable, middle-of-the-rotation pitcher can pitch deep into the ballgame allowing only one run. A lousy utility infielder starting at second by default can get a clutch hit in the 8th inning to take a two-run lead. One of 2008's worst relief pitchers can toss an uneventful bottom of the 8th. And I don't care who is coming to bat in the 9th, one of the game's most respected closers can retire three hitters without surrendering 2 runs. If the three most improbable of these actually happened, then the Twins can win that game and beat the Yankees in a 5-game series.

Instead, they dug themselves a 2-game hole. And unfortunately, the regular season taught them that it's perfectly acceptable to do this. It doesn't matter if you squander a 12-run lead in Oakland because you can always beat the Tigers in a tie-breaker. The Yankees in the playoffs are better than the Tigers in the regular season. I still have faith in the Metrodome to keep things interesting, but realistically Friday was the chance. Then again, in a series with Blackburn pitching well in the Bronx, Punto getting clutch hits, and Guerrier mowing down Yankees does conventional wisdom really apply?

Brett Favre

2009-10-06T18:58:00.001-07:00

Did the lowly Twins just upstage Brett Favre throwing three touchdowns for the Vikings against the Packers? I don't care how pathetic the AL Central has been, a great baseball game is a great baseball game. They've played 163 games now, and I still have no clue what to think of these Twins. On Sunday, it took four pitchers to get through the 6th inning with a 7-run lead against the Royals. Yet, they keep winning ballgames and have a solid nucleus with serviceable role players. Whether this game marked the end of a great comeback or a monumental collapse in a pennant race will be decided by the next three to five games. They are as close to embarrassing themselves in a three game sweep as they are to winning the World Series. There is just one thing I know: The Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome is not going to let anybody tell it when it will host it's last Major League Baseball game.

Sacrifice Fly

2009-10-06T18:04:00.001-07:00

He can't even hit it far enough to score Casilla. And Alexi "runs around the bases pretty well." He wouldn't even need to hit it that far if his inept play hadn't cost the team victories earlier in the season.

Oh boy.

2009-10-06T17:58:00.001-07:00

Oh, boy.

Deluded Optimism

2009-10-01T19:34:00.000-07:00

2009 has been the year of deluded optimism for the Twins. Could there be a more fitting finish then heading into the final weekend with just a half game margin for error? They could still win the division. For all the reasons to doubt the Twins, there is just as much reason to doubt the Tigers. How would you feel if the Twins took a two-game lead into a final weekend series at home against the White Sox? Throughout most of this season, the Twins have looked like a team with no business in the playoffs, but the Tigers have refused to put us out of our misery. Even Punto tried to do his part by bunting into a double play in the series opener. Did anybody else wonder why Casilla, Punto, and Tolbert all had the chance to grab a bat in the top of the 9th of a tie game against the team with a 2-game lead in the division with 7 games to play? Carl Pavano was available to pinch hit.

A Chilly Wind

2009-09-28T19:09:00.000-07:00

A strong wind from the north has lowered the temperature in Minnesota. The cool air and bright colors are probably supposed to make me think of football. To me, this weather means that after a hot (or not so hot in 2009) summer, it's finally time for real baseball. I'm looking forward to watching October baseball, and despite the Twins best efforts the Twins may not have that chance. It's anybody's guess what they'll do in Detroit, but I'd be surprised if the two teams combine for more than 1 win during the final weekend.

While I contemplate the outfield and first baseman for my All Metrodome team, I will name the designated hitter. This one is even easier than Gaetti. Nobody is the All Metrodome DH. There have been a few isolated successes, but throughout their stay at the Dome, the Twins have not had a designated hitter. Chili Davis had a strong year in '91, Paul Molitor received a few MVP votes in '96, lately Kubel has settled into the role, and David Ortiz had an outstanding month in July 2002. That covers about 6 of the Twins nearly 30 seasons under the teflon bubble. The rest of the time, platoon outfielders and mediocre free agents attempted to fill the void. Heck, even Denny Hocking started at DH now and then. For as crazy as it sounds to put a light-hitting utility infielder at DH, at least he was a career .250 hitter and rarely flirted with the Mendoza line for most of a season.

Eighty Two

2009-09-24T19:48:00.000-07:00

It's over. The Tigers won their 82 game clinching a winning record for the American League Central Division champion. The Indians ruined it by completely collapsing instead of starting to play great baseball long after it stopped mattering. Speaking of that, now that attention in Minnesota has turned to #4 the Twins have played pretty well lately. The players' comments following the 2-1 series win over the Tigers sounded generally disappointed. What a contrast from all the times they'd pat themselves on the back for winning 1 of 6. Meanwhile, as I predicted, Punto continues to tear it up in all of the meaningless games assuring Twins fans another 500 at bats in the 2010 campaign.

I suppose I ought to name my All Metrodome third baseman. Much to my surprise, I am not bestowing the honor collectively to Tony Batista, Jeff Cirillo, Mike Lamb and anybody else to man the hot-corner since Koskie. The surly Canadian tempts me, I'll never forget Ron Coomer representing the Twins in the all-star game, Dave Hollins had a nice visit, and the Twins won a World Series platooning Scott Leius and Mike Pagliarulo. I'm not even old enough to remember Gary Gaetti, but I know he's the only choice. Now that I've made all of the easy picks, I'll have to settle on three outfielders. (The pitcher takes even less thought). I hope to post those before I talk myself into Pedro Munoz. (Make sure you pronounce that "Moo-Nose" like T.K. did back in the day.

Happy Birthday

2009-09-14T18:57:00.000-07:00

I could not let the day go by without wishing Delmon Young a happy 24th birthday. Honestly, I'm not really sure what the Twins did this weekend. But I'm fairly certain they still think they have a chance at the playoffs.

Before I talk myself back into Todd Walker, I'm naming Chuck Knoblauch as my All Metrodome second baseman. He was a big part of the world championship and the players received in the trade (Milton, Guzman, and Buchanan) helped to rebuild the franchise a decade later. He took forever to adjust his batting gloves in several campaigns that earned him MVP consideration. I always liked his shaggy appearance as well. I'm still disappointed that the Twins didn't give him another shot after the Royals disappointing attempt to revive his career.

All Metrodome Catcher

2009-09-07T12:01:00.000-07:00

The middle of the lineup is mired in a slump resembling a typical week for the middle of the infield, but otherwise the Twins have not done anything blog-worthy in a while. I take that back. Cuddyer and Morneau's "slump" would qualify as a hot streak for Casilla or Punto. In light of that, I continue naming players to my All Metrodome team. A month of two ago, I selected Pat Meares as the shortstop.

The catcher lead the club to several division championships while facing plenty of 0-2 counts as a left-handed hitter. He's one of the best catchers to wear a Twins uniform in the Metrodome era, and I will never understand the boos with which the Metrodome crowd greets A.J. Pierzynski. He has always been a solid backstop and tough out. He called a good game and seemed to handle the pitching staff pretty well. For as long as he wore a Twins uniform, he did everything he could to win each ballgame. Joe Mauer is a great player, too. I have nothing against him, but I still miss Pierzynski.

Reruns

2009-08-30T19:46:00.000-07:00

Didn't the Twins already win a game to "get back to .500" this year? It seems like they do it every other day. I'm too lazy to look it up, but you'd think they could be making a run at a club record for the most times they have accomplished this feat in a single season.

I am worried about the Earth spinning off of its axis. Nick Punto laid down a nice bunt on a squeeze play today. Oddly enough, when he actually tries to sacrifice bunt in a sacrifice bunt situation, he gets on base. Who knew? If only he had managed to remember this all of those times he tried to bunt for a base hit when he was supposed to be sacrificing himself.

Apparently, Nick Punto's son was born earlier this week. With September call-ups around the corner, I think it's safe to expect another Punto in the lineup by Wednesday. At least the younger Punto has a chance to draw a walk before he hits a wimpy pop-fly to second.

Pleasantly Surprising Weekend

2009-08-23T19:32:00.000-07:00

The Twins pleasantly surprised fans this weekend. I saw those three letters I love to see by Nick Punto's name: DNP. It's much better than GIDP- although that typically requires hitting the ball hard and on the ground. I guess that's the one upside to weak pop-ups to second. I'd say it can't be a coincidence that they swept the series with Punto on the bench, but that just means Casilla is out there instead. Both have their batting averages creeping upwards.

This sweep probably means the series with the Royals to close the Dome will be less interesting. I had expected that series would be for 4th place. And while the Twins could play poorly enough to make it close, the Royals can't play well enough to make up the ground. But there is one prize still in sights: Winning the division with a losing record. Can you imagine the Twins entering the final game at 80-81 with the Tigers at 79-82 and both teams lost to send the 80-82 Twins to the playoffs? I guess I would feel bad for the Metrodome to have to host the playoff series.

Homestand, Standings, Preseason

2009-08-16T08:02:00.000-07:00

Today opens with the Twins 6 games behind 1st place Detroit and Cleveland 12 games behind first place Detroit. In other words, the Twins are as close to 4th place as 1st. Based on the quality of play lately, it's clear which direction they are headed. This afternoon, the Twins are not playing to "get back in the pennant race" in the AL Central. Instead, they are playing to protect their headstart in the race to stay out of 4th place. A strong finish would be nice, but honestly at this point, I wonder if an embarrassing 4th or 5th place finish may be best. If they limp to a third place finish, the marketing department can try to blame luck and injuries, but if things completely crumble they will know that the current personnel will be a tougher sell in Target Field.

The downside to the impending meaningless September baseball is that Nick Punto seems to perform at his best once thoughts in Minnesota have turned purple. He'll catch fire against the recalled AAA pitching and bring his average back to respectability. "Respectability" may seem insurmountable, but I figure he has about 160 at-bats left. If he hits .300 over that stretch, it brings him up to .240 or so for the season. Remember, he hit .286 in September of 2007 to salvage a .210 average. With Gardy at the helm, we know he'll get at-bats.

The Bunt

2009-08-13T18:18:00.000-07:00

From the accounts of Wednesday evening's game, I gathered that the Twins had all but wrapped up the 2009 American Central pennant. The Tigers lost, the Twins had some timely hitting, and Liriano reverted from- excuse me- returned to form. Certainly, the win was refreshing, and the Tigers and White Sox are undoubtedly too mediocre to end Twins fans' misery any time soon. A strong ballgame today would have at suggested that Wednesday's 5-1 victory was not an anomaly. Instead, a middle infielder with a .200 batting average known for his ability with the little things failed to lay down a sacrifice bunt with nobody out and two runners on base late in a 1-run contest that the Twins lost by 1 run. His whole tenure with the Twins would have been worth it if only Gardy or Bill Smith had marched onto the field and given Punto his outright release before he had time to get up, brush the dirt off- even if he fouled out, I'm sure he slid headfirst into first base- and return to the dugout. Is that too much to ask?

Boxscore

2009-08-12T19:03:00.001-07:00

(Thankfully) I was busy last night and missed the ballgame. I skimmed over the box score this morning. I saw Punto listed toward the middle of the order and listed as the 3rd baseman. What does it say that I thought he started the game batting in the middle of the order following Morneau in the batting lineup? I legitimately thought manager Ron Gardenhire decided to "mix things up a little bit" and "work Nicky in there." I then discovered that he had just one trip to the plate and apparently replaced Morneau late in the game.

Today, heads rolled in the Milwaukee Brewer's organization. In principal, I respect the stability of the Twins, but now and then I would like to see them employ such euphemisms as "dismissed" or "designated for assignment" in description of Twins personnel.

Dancin' Homer

2009-08-10T16:39:00.000-07:00

Big Bill McLoskey coming up. As soon as he pops out, we'll get straight to the post-game show.

I happened to watch the Dancin' Homer episode of the Simpsons this evening. The dejection in the broadcaster's voice matches the emotion of Jon Gordon during recent Twins games. Regrettably, he does not actually phrase things so cynically.

In a 2006 game, I recall that the Twins had runners on first and second with nobody out late in a close ball game on the road. Nick Punto stepped into the box- probably batting in the second spot in the order- and unceremoniously laid down a perfect sacrifice bunt. His entire focus was on advancing the runners. He didn't try to be a hero and beat out the "sacrifice" nor did he try to drag it or slide headfirst into the base. A run from even one baserunner would have been a huge boost. Instead, the extra pressure on the pitcher produced a game-breaking rally for the Twins. At this point, I was willing to accept that the Twins would play the remainder of 2006 with a light-hitting utility infielder playing third base. If he plays superb defense and does the proverbial little things, it's a decent arrangement considering the shortage of quality third-basemen.

Since then, he has proven to be one of the worst on the team with the fundamentals. Yesterday, he failed another critical sacrifice bunt. For somebody who can't get on base, he has a remarkable knack for getting picked off. His defense is above average at best, and the the foolish risks he takes in order to justify his place in the lineup backfire far too often.

Just once, I would love to hear Gordon say it:

Punto coming up. Heck, let's just start the post-game show now.

E4

2009-08-07T16:21:00.000-07:00

Sure, the official scorer ruled it a hit. I don't care. Good thing we have Punto out there to play great defense for us. Of course, Gardy will blame the run on Harris. These Twins are so depressing, I'm looking forward to the Vikings. Heck, they are so pitiful, I honestly found myself excited to see how the Timberwolves do this year. Pavano and Cabrera must be wondering what they did to deserve this. And Cabrera was traded from Oakland.

It's now 4-1 before I have time to finish my post venting frustration at our $4 million defensive wizard. If he saves so many runs, why didn't he make that play? Argh.

I followed the Twins pretty closely through the late 90's and I couldn't even make it through one inning tonight.

Attack of the Clones

2009-08-03T17:23:00.000-07:00

The Angels have left town having thoroughly embarrassed the Twins. I'm sure the Twins will pat themselves on the back for sweeping the Sox, though. Last weekend in Anaheim, Angels infielders Erick Aybar and Maicer Izturis nearly collided while playing a pop-up. One of them caught it- I'm not sure who. Aybar, Izturis, and Figgins are all pretty much from the same mold. Then I remember that the Twins acquired Alexi Casilla from the Angels organization. Curiously, though, the trio on the Angels has combined for only one full season (with 200 or more at-bats) with a batting average below .250. Why is it that these Piranhas can actually hit like so many people pretend Nick Punto can? Individually, a .270 hitter without much pop isn't much of a threat, but collectively they can do considerably more damage. Those 70 batting average points are a big difference. It's over twice as likely (1.9% to 0.8%) that all three of them get a hit in any given time through the order. The way the Angels run the bases, that's at least one run. Likewise, every time they don't get out, that's one more chance for the big sticks.

The most frustrating part of the pitching is that it makes complaining about the infielders seem so pointless.

The $4 Million Man

2009-07-31T15:57:00.000-07:00

The Twins traded for Orlando Cabrera. They already have a $4 million dollar shortstop. He gets all the playing time because for some reason the manager refuses to let the adequate hitting shortstop with average defense play regularly. If it's any consolation, we can pretend that the front office is admitting that they signed the wrong $4 million dollar shortstop. The trade certainly shouldn't hurt anything- they guy they gave up has considerably worse numbers than Matt Tolbert did at that level. Although one would have to think being different than Tolbert is good regardless.

I would like to think that Bill Smith understands that this move does little to improve the Twins. Pitching is clearly the real problem. Since the All-Star break, they have lost maybe one game (5-3 in Texas) on which on blame rests on the offense. But the reality is that Bill Smith was not the man behind this move. I'm sure Dave St. Peter wants to appease the armchair GM's who sympathize with Mauer and Morneau's pleas for a deal in order to market the Target Field Twins. I do not fault Mauer and Morneau for frustration, but I would rather they challenge their teammates to fill the void.

There is still time a deadline deal which could greatly revitalize this club. There is still time to swing a deal which moves Punto, Tolbert, Casilla, and Buscher for a pocketful of magic beans.

All Metrodome Team

2009-07-29T19:01:00.000-07:00

There has been popular demand from my reader that I name my own All Metrodome team. So I will. I begin with shortstop because I want to make the pick before I talk myself out of it.

There really is only one choice at short. His steady play up the middle defined an era of Twins baseball. During his tenure, the Twins manage 70 wins just 3 times and twice failed to win 60. One of the darkest days in franchise history came when the Twins could not even afford to prevent Pat Meares from departing for the greener pastures of the Pittsburgh Pirates. That was rock bottom. I recall the despair when I heard this news.

Meares joined the Twins in 1993. The momentum of the '91 championship was gone. Upon his departure after the 1998 season, the Twins unveiled their youth movement team with a roster consisting almost entirely of rookies. These 1999 Twins featured such players as Doug Mientkiewicz, Corey Koskie, Christian Guzman, Torii Hunter, Jacque Jones. Even A.J. Pierzynski caught a few games. Brad Radke, Eric Milton, and Joe Mays held spots in the rotation. Meares had almost no connection to the success on either side of his time with the Twins. Nearly every other player from the Pat Meares era had either played in the World Series or stayed for a few years with the youth.

I will not forget the time I was at a game and Meares won it with a walk-off ground-rule double.

Bankruptcy

2009-07-27T19:04:00.000-07:00

A radio advertisement for a law firm specializing in bankruptcy aired during the Twins broadcast. They opened by saying, "If you're credit score is lower than Nick Punto's batting average..." I apologize to my new favorite law firm for not catching their name, but I was too delighted at that blatant recognition of the four-million-dollar man's pathetic batting average.

Bill Smith Quote

2009-07-25T06:31:00.001-07:00

Apparently Twins general manager Bill Smith wonders why nobody ever asks him what he thinks about the team after they have won four out of five. I think he answered his own question. I will be first in line to ask him if they ever win four of five.

For as much criticism as he takes, he has actually done a pretty good job. The biggest mistake was resigning Punto. The next biggest mistake was not trading Liriano when he would have been able to get something for him. Not trading the left-hander reeks of trying to appease knee-jerk armchair GM's who could not recognize that his success was the direct result of a violently unsustainable delivery. The last thing I want in a GM is a coward who does whatever he thinks will appease the fans.

Speaking of cowards, Terry Ryan threw Bill Smith under the bus with Johan Santana. He quit his job to avoid blame for the Cy Young winner leaving. I like the deal Smith went for, and I question Twins coaching at all levels as to why there has not been as much of a return on the deal.

Well, this afternoon, the Twins have another shot at getting back to .500. The whole organization seems so content with such milestones, it's hard to believe they'll win four of five anytime soon.

Red Flags

2009-07-22T18:41:00.000-07:00

The team that can't hold a 10-run complains about umpires not being able to do their jobs perfectly? That's a red flag. Hey, look on the bright side. Tomorrow, the Twins head to Anaheim where they will have yet another chance to climb above .500.

2009-07-20T19:05:00.000-07:00

Punto batting second? I quit.

The Big Move

2009-07-19T15:04:00.001-07:00

I'm too lazy to look and I have forgotten. Had I mentioned that Mark Grudzielanek and Ray Durham were free agents? Yes, he's old, injury prone, and hasn't played this year. What does it say about the $4-million man that the Twins would even think about Grudzielanek? The sad reality is that this move is bad news. If Grudzielank produces at all, he'll get Buscher's roster spot. Gardy will be tempted to bench Harris, but he will not actually go through with it. Remember those incentives in Joe Crede's contract about at-bats? Gardy will move Punto back to short and "work Harrisy in there over at third to get some at-bats" while they try Grudzielanek at second. The result is an unstable left side of the infield and an over-the-hill second baseman. It would just be too easy to leave the left side alone and use Punto as a defensive replacement for Grudzielanek.

Trades

2009-07-18T08:11:00.000-07:00

The All-Star game has passed and now and now begin all the rumors and discussion of what the Twins will do. The consensus among talking heads seems to be that the Twins need to do something. There also seems to be agreement that regardless of what they should do, they will not do anything. Realistically, I cannot see how any deal could significantly improve the team.

What weaknesses could they address? Second base is a black hole on offense, but they do have enough bats in the lineup to afford one weak-hitter provided he plays solid defense. The best chance of improvement at second would be if Casilla can conquer his fear of the ball and "hit the cover off the ball" in the Majors like he did in Rochester. In the outfield, Span plays great defense and reliably reaches base for Mauer and Morneau. Cuddyer, although strike-out prone, supplements the middle of the order as well as anybody. Gomez and Young have played better lately, and the Twins should be able to expect a strong second half from one of the two.

This leaves pitching as a hole to fill. Unfortunately, there is no way the Twins can trade for what the staff needs. They need Brad Radke. The current rotation consists of solid 3rd or 4th starters. They're missing the reliable ace who pitches reliably and always throws his best games when they're most needed. Ideally, they would have at least two pitchers like that. They do not have nearly enough depth in the farm system to trade for a pitcher of that caliber.

This highlights another weakness. They have no depth. Tolbert and Buscher are lousy even by "quadruple-a" standards, and they have nobody in Rochester who could hold down the fort over a 15-day stint on the DL. Back in '02 when both Koskie and Mientkiewicz were hurt, they still had David Ortiz, Michael Cuddyer, Matt LeCroy, Casey Blake, and even Bobby Kielty to play the corner infield.

A change-of-scenery trade with some combination of Gomez, Young, and Casilla might be the only legitimate option, but it's too early to give up on their potential. Regardless, the best a trade can do is improve their chances of embarrassing themselves in the division series again. The best a non-trade could do would be if Gomez, Young, and Casilla play well in the second half, a pitcher or two grows into the "ace" role, and one of the fresh faces adopts the role of a strong set-up man. That's the big "ifs" that could make the Twins a legitimate contender for an AL pennant. Unless of course they want to trade Punto and Tolbert for some magic beans. I'd be find with that.

Mulvey???

2009-07-15T16:00:00.000-07:00

The Twins will begin the second half of the season with pitchers following the call-up of Kevin Mulvey. (Fittingly, I forgot his first name as I was writing that sentence and had to look it up). Reserve catcher Jose Morales was sent back to Rochester. It must be so tough for a manager to have to choose between having too many catchers or too many pitchers. Meanwhile, the team has just one middle infielder.

AL Central Competition

2009-07-09T18:09:00.000-07:00

Earlier this week, one of the STRIB bloggers commented that the White Sox are the team in the AL Central that Twins must fear. I think he phrased it rather poorly. This week's series with the Yankees reminded that there is just one ballclub in the American League Central that threatens the Twins chances of winning the division. Despite the shortcomings I rant about, the division belongs to the Twins if they want it. They have two of the best hitters in baseball protected by three more solid threats. I may complain about Punto, but I can live with a lineup in which he is the only lousy hitter. The starting pitching has been solid lately, and now that the only current relief pitchers I can name are Dickey, Guerrier, and Nathan I feel better about the bullpen. The division is the Twins to lose and they have most of the same players as last year. Did they learn anything from all of those "It's-only-one-game" quotes on 2008?

The Script

2009-07-04T06:37:00.001-07:00

Last night- well technically this morning- the Twins found themselves on the losing end of one of my favorite "scripts" for a baseball game. As is typically the case with games like these, I missed the first few innings. I turn on the radio, "and the Twins trailing six to nothing here in the third." The Twins added two runs in the third and fourth allowing the "it's still early; maybe they can creep back into this" thought to creep into fans' heads. Then they put up 5 in the 6th to tie it at 7 and knock the opposing starter from the game. At this point, I probably should have just shut the radio off for an hour or two because I've followed baseball long enough to know to expect the game to play out like this:

"They're in the bottom of the 7th out in Los Angeles. Here at the Metrodome, neither team has scored since the 6th inning."

"The Tigers take a one run lead here, and the last man in the bullpen will be on to try to stop the Twins."

"The Twins manage to tie in the bottom of the inning. The Orioles have wrapped up their win in Anaheim. Is that Scott Baker heading down to the Twins bullpen?"

There's nothing quite like that moment in the 12th inning when you realize you've heard a full 9 innings even though you started late. I guess the only thing missing from this game was the big hit from a defensive replacement in his second at-bat and the great defensive play by the pinch-hitter.

Pujols

2009-06-28T10:17:00.000-07:00

There is some outrage that the Twins opted to pitch to the Cardinals star slugger. Ordinarily, I am not one to focus too much on statistics. I don't care about OBPS and I don't know what VORP means. Generally, if it sounds like the onamotapeoia from the old live-action Batman show with Adam West, I ignore it. On the other hand, simple statistics such as at-bats, hits, RBI's, and HR's distinguish perception and reality with a hitter like Pujols. While two-thirds of my readers are far more qualified to assess the risk than I am, I took a look at what the numbers say about the decision to pitch to Pujols.

First of all, he has 314 plate appearances in which he has not been intentionally walked. In those he has 74 RBI's (assuming he was not intentionally passed with bases loaded) and 28 HRs. If you assume 5 trips to the plate per game, an opposing manager could expect Pujols to drive in 1.16 runs if he pitches to Pujols each time. That is not going to beat you unless he gets some help. Right now, the skeptics are thinking that his overall numbers are skewed because managers pitch around him in tight spots. He's been intentionally walked 24 times. Let's (generously) assume that instead he hit a 3-run homer in every one those trips to the plate. Using that rate of run production, he'd still only be expected to drive in 2 runs per 5 plate appearances. That's an absolute upper bound on the damage we should expect, and it's still not enough to win a game.

Sometimes he might hit two home runs against you. In 4 trips to the plate, he has about a 5% at hitting at least two home runs. By contrast, he has a 15% chance of going 0-4. He is three times more likely to go hitless than he is to hit two home runs. The conventional wisdom to pitch around him is based largely on the weakness of the rest of the order. If Pujols goes ofer, the rest of the lineup has some work to do. Yesterday, the Twins were victims of a rare- but nonetheless possible- occurrence. I'm willing to excuse the pitcher for throwing meatballs because all of these probabilities implicitly incorporate the reality that pitchers can't always hit their spots. Even then, Pujols did not beat the Twins yesterday. The Twins lost because they made a fielding error, hit a batter, the guy hitting ahead of Pujols had two hits, and the Twins refused to generate any offense after the fourth inning.

Annual Traditions

2009-06-25T19:02:00.001-07:00

While I've been too lazy to post, Twins players, coaches, and reporters have begun one of my favorite June traditions. "This is where we were last year" rings the chorus. "We usually hit a hot streak about this time" the say. Where did they end up last year? They lost game 163 1-0 because they only managed a single win against the Royals on the final weekend. In 2008, "last year" they muddled to a sub-five-hundred third-place finish after muddling around .500 for the first two months. In the Twins favorite last year- 2006- they completed a 4-month comeback to overtake the Tigers and earn the right to a disastrous, embarrassing three-game sweep against the A's. In 2005, they were about .500 in June, and finished at about .500 for third place. I'm sick and tired of the Twins propaganda machine telling us to be excited about mediocrity. A good place to be in June is having already played two and half months of good baseball. In 2002, by June, the Twins commanded a several game lead in the division. A dominant series to begin the month knocked Cleveland down for several years, and the White Sox stumbled about .500. At this point, talk focused not on their status in the division, but rather on how the Twins matched up against other teams in Major League Baseball.

2005 San Diego Padres

2009-06-09T18:00:00.000-07:00

Usually a pennant race features two top-tier rivals playing a heated September series while perhaps scoreboard-watching another foe. The 2009 AL Central may feature a team contending not with another ballclub, but instead a theoretical benchmark. In 2005, the San Diego Padres won the NL West with a record of 82-80. Without doing the research, I'd wager this is the worst ever record to win a division. Second place Arizona finished at 77-85. Could we see the AL Central champion finish the season with a losing record? Conventional wisdom suggest that at about this point of the season, a team or two will hit a hot streak to win pole position for the pennant race. But what if Detroit has already had the hot streak to put themselves in first? If "normal" is worse than they've played- or they slump for a week or two- the entire division could sink below .500. The division's saving grace may be that the games they play amongst each other guarantee 180 total wins for the division.

AL Central

2009-06-02T16:39:00.000-07:00

June begins with just 8 games separating first place from last in the American League Central. After a fast start, the Royals have quickly faded to 4th place. The Twins and White Sox have spent two months muddling around .500. Despite high hopes, the Indians early struggles prompted many pundits to dismiss their 2009 season. To date, the Tigers have successfully countered the cynics' speculation of a fire sale. This early June series featuring an inconsistent Twins club hosting a disappointing Indians club will likely define the season for the Central division. A sweep by the Twins announces their intention to win a division title. On the other hand, a sweep by the Indians drags the Twins towards the cellar and gives the Indians hope. In all likelihood, one of the teams will win two of three. Either case suggests four more months of mediocre teams with the least bad holding out to win the division.

Joe Mauer and the Twins Future

2009-05-30T08:41:00.000-07:00

The young catcher's hot-hitting has drawn national attention and sparked discussion regarding his future with the Twins. The cynics talk as though he already plays for the Boston Red Sox. On the other hand, the romantics picture the homegrown talent playing his career as a Twin because he is "Minnesota nice." Both sides raise valid points, yet overlook what the most relevant facts have to tell us.

Twins current payroll: $65 million/year
MLB Highest Salary (Alex Rodriguez): $27 million/year
Highest '09 signing and most comparable player (Mark Teixiera): $22 million/year
League Minimum Salary: $390 thousand / year.

The Twins could pay Mauer and Morneau $27 million each, and still have enough of their current payroll left to pay 22 players league minimum and Nick Punto the remaining $4 million. The suggestion may appear to be purely hypothetical speculation, but is it really that much of a change from the current roster? In all likelihood, the Target Field Twins will be a triple-a team with two stars and a few overpaid veterans.

The Pohlads always have run the franchise as a business. They know that they need fans to make money. I doubt Dave St. Peter wants to try to market the Twins should either Mauer or Morneau leave. Inversely, generating fan interest with that pair is considerably easier. Rightfully, fans love Mauer and Morneau, and in the AL Central, the team will always remain competitive enough to keep interest. St. Peter doesn't think fans expect much. In an editorial in today's Star Tribune, he declares, "It doesn't take much to improve the experience of our fans. The bar hasn't been set very high." That says it all. St. Peter and the Pohlads know that if a they can generate interest for a mediocre team in the Metrodome, then they can attract fans to watch a glorified AAA team at Target Field.

Here's the fun part, though. Now we don't have to tolerate it. The organization has no leverage over fans. If they don't field a decent team, we don't have to watch. We've built their stadium and they're stuck with us. Once Target Field opens, it's far easier for the franchise to convince Minnesotans to watch the home team than it would be to convince another metropolitan area to build a stadium. And no matter how much crap Dick Bremer tells us about being a "small market" the people making the business decision realize that the Twin Cities is actually a lucrative location.