Big Bill McLoskey coming up. As soon as he pops out, we'll get straight to the post-game show.
I happened to watch the Dancin' Homer episode of the Simpsons this evening. The dejection in the broadcaster's voice matches the emotion of Jon Gordon during recent Twins games. Regrettably, he does not actually phrase things so cynically.
In a 2006 game, I recall that the Twins had runners on first and second with nobody out late in a close ball game on the road. Nick Punto stepped into the box- probably batting in the second spot in the order- and unceremoniously laid down a perfect sacrifice bunt. His entire focus was on advancing the runners. He didn't try to be a hero and beat out the "sacrifice" nor did he try to drag it or slide headfirst into the base. A run from even one baserunner would have been a huge boost. Instead, the extra pressure on the pitcher produced a game-breaking rally for the Twins. At this point, I was willing to accept that the Twins would play the remainder of 2006 with a light-hitting utility infielder playing third base. If he plays superb defense and does the proverbial little things, it's a decent arrangement considering the shortage of quality third-basemen.
Since then, he has proven to be one of the worst on the team with the fundamentals. Yesterday, he failed another critical sacrifice bunt. For somebody who can't get on base, he has a remarkable knack for getting picked off. His defense is above average at best, and the the foolish risks he takes in order to justify his place in the lineup backfire far too often.
Just once, I would love to hear Gordon say it:
Punto coming up. Heck, let's just start the post-game show now.